PALS: Phantsmal Avatar Leage of Superheroes

[BatWing]

:prem: Well, it's nice of you to come. Guess who's alive.

:eyebrow: { There's no need for me to guess Premo, for I sense the ever so darkening presence of a shadow manipulator that can only be Previsionary!! 


[OOG - Raijin, apologies for the lack of response.  Unfortunately we've been scattered to the four winds by various storylines at the moment so the base is relatively empty for now. 

ok then

[Sword]

*arrives in a teleport stream, with an angry cybernetic ferret attached to his shoulder blade.*
:sword I hate fighting the Gigarat. Lane, if you're around I've got yet another cybernetic rodent to add to our collection.
*senses ozone* Well... judging from the fact that booze is all still intact, It's not thor. There must be another lightning user here *see Raijin*
:sword Ah there you are. Welcome to PALS headquarters. We have a simple four part questionnaire for oyu to fill out.
*hands Raijin the paper with the following four questions:
1)Are you now, or were you at any time, evil?
2) If you answered yes to the first question, how long has it been since you've committed an evil act?
3) Do you have any objection to working with the laugh of Santa Claus and the undead?
4) Can you withstand great periods of inactivity, and possibly being shunted into an alternate world for months on end?
:sword Answer truthfully now. The paper is magically treated to burst into flames if you lie.

[Spam]

*noticing Sword's entry, hopes he doesn't have to do anything anymore*

:spam: "Sword, my good buddy! How are you?" *whispers*

:spam: "Look, this guy has been giving me the silent treatment for ages now. I even gave him the jeopordy button, but still nothing! But your here now, so you can take care of everything, I hope..."

:spam: "Good luck, Mr. Raijin sir."

FORIAMSPAM!

[Sword]

*pawns off the robotic rodent on Spam*

[Deaths Jester]

*gives up on looking for this supposed bar of his and "oozes" his way back to where Sword and Spammy are standing, noticing the odd new lighting 'ero standing before them."

*whispers to his team mates*  "Who the 'ell be this flashy tosspot standing 'ere?  I mean, doesn't he know that that much electricity will probably short out Lane's radio station?!?"

-DJ

[Premonitioner]

:eyebrow:  :angry: { The Phantom NOSELIP!?  Undoubtedly this... IMPOSTER... is trying to gain some credibility for himself by ripping off my act!  I would soon meet this noselip and give him a good brow-beating!

:prem: Yes, I know it's a shock. It shocked me too...that's why I called you.

:eybrow: { Erm... I can teleport about 1 block at a time and it does take a bit of energy to do so.  Teleporting from London to Paris would take a large number of jumps and, well, we ARE at an airport...

:prem:  :unsure: I figured your teleporting powers were much more powerful than that. I mean...you seemed so powerful back when Omegus was a threat. No worries...I can take care of this.

*prem takes out a golden colored amulet with a scarab printed on the front. He places the amulet around TPE's neck and then places another one around his own.*

:prem: As you remember, I was a practicing mage before I disappeared. I kinda stopped focusing on spells and went back to my mental powers + gagdets...but I should be efficient enough to pull off a simple teleport spell to Paris. Of course you trust me, right?

*prem awaits TPE's answer and then begins to speak*

:prem: E cissuh draa, ur bufan uv mekrd yht tynghacc, aspat sa fedr dra bufan du dnyhcbuca so bucedeuh uh drec Ayndr. E cissuh draa...caht ic du Bynec yd dra cbaat uv mekrd!

*prem and TPE are engulfed in colorful lights of energy as they are instantly transported to a volcano in the center of Paris. The smell of lava is plentiful and TPE may notice some odd things roaming about...like a 20ft hell dog*

:prem: Don't freak out, ok? It's been tamed since that giant battle took place. Think of it as...France's personal body guard of some sort. Shall we go?

[Spam]

*tries girly-slapping the robotic thing off his shoulder*

*gets slapped back*

:spam: "I see you brought me a present, Sword..."

*runs away, still with the robotic rodent holding on to his shoulder*

:spam: "Oh yeah? You want some of this hot stuff?"

*runs outside, in which he begins to fly, hoping he can fly it off*

:spam: "How do you like that wi-"

*has his ear bitten by mechanical little teeth*

:spam: "WHY DON'T YOU JUST STOP, AND FALL LIKE YOUR SUPPOSED TO!?"

FORIAMSPAM!

[kkhohoho]

*tries girly-slapping the robotic thing off his shoulder*

*gets slapped back*

:spam: "I see you brought me a present, Sword..."

*runs away, still with the robotic rodent holding on to his shoulder*

:spam: "Oh yeah? You want some of this hot stuff?"

*runs outside, in which he begins to fly, hoping he can fly it off*

:spam: "How do you like that wi-"

*has his ear bitten by mechanical little teeth*

:spam: "WHY DON'T YOU JUST STOP, AND FALL LIKE YOUR SUPPOSED TO!?"

FORIAMSPAM!

*After having a nice nap on the padio, the evil Santa-clone awakes from his slumber, and sees Spam fighting off a metallic rodent.*

:santa: I guess I should help out Spam.  *Runs inside, grabs DJ's arm, runs back outside while hearing words of not-so-niceness being said, and throws the bone at the roboferret.  It hits Spam right in the noggon, and bounces off of the manly meat. The ferret sees the bone, and proceeds to chase after it.*  Well Spam, felling better? :)

[Spam]

:spam: "Yes, now that mechanical ferrets aren't biting my ear, and elbows aren't bouncing off my face, I feel much better. I thank you for your assistance..."

*kicks the ferret whilst its chasing DJ's already dead arm*

FORIAMSPAM!

[Deaths Jester]

*tries girly-slapping the robotic thing off his shoulder*

*gets slapped back*

:spam: "I see you brought me a present, Sword..."

*runs away, still with the robotic rodent holding on to his shoulder*

:spam: "Oh yeah? You want some of this hot stuff?"

*runs outside, in which he begins to fly, hoping he can fly it off*

:spam: "How do you like that wi-"

*has his ear bitten by mechanical little teeth*

:spam: "WHY DON'T YOU JUST STOP, AND FALL LIKE YOUR SUPPOSED TO!?"

FORIAMSPAM!

*After having a nice nap on the padio, the evil Santa-clone awakes from his slumber, and sees Spam fighting off a metallic rodent.*

:santa: I guess I should help out Spam.  *Runs inside, grabs DJ's arm, runs back outside while hearing words of not-so-niceness being said, and throws the bone at the roboferret.  It hits Spam right in the noggon, and bounces off of the manly meat. The ferret sees the bone, and proceeds to chase after it.*  Well Spam, felling better? :)

Wha' the?!?!?!  Me arm!!!  Why the blood 'ell do ye blokes always 'ave to do something to me when I ain't looking?!?!?!  I mean, come now..this is bloody annoying!  And KKHAHAHA ye better watch ye butt cause I'm gonna pay ye back for that...somehow...some day...somewhere...with a plunger!!

*wander over and takes his arm back...knocking the cyber ferret back towards Spam in the process*

Now to go find some glue and reattach this extremity...*wanders off cursing under his breath*

[The Phantom Eyebrow]

:prem: Don't freak out, ok? It's been tamed since that giant battle took place. Think of it as...France's personal body guard of some sort. Shall we go?

:eyebrow: { Um yes... let's do that.  We should really put some distance between ourselves and... this place. 

* The Phantom Eyebrow pauses a moment to consider the magnitude of what may lie ahead - all thoughts of a nice holiday in Paris replaced now by fears of being rent limb from limb or potentially even a worse fate at the hands of some eldrich abomination *

:eyebrow: { Perhaps I should give the base a call eh?  Let them know where I am...

[Alaric]

Outside the base, a mysterious figure in green and black has appeared, oozing of vowelish might. Yes, the Verdant Vowel has arrived! Remembering his one, brief, and confusing adventure with the PALS, despite its having been deleted along with all the other older posts, he has come to offer assistance in any battles, missions, or other dire happenings the PALS may currently be involved with. Or at least bum a free meal.

[Sword]

*a teleport stream opens behind the Verdant Vowel and several CacoDaemons emerge. Sword emerges last, and proceeds to lead the daemons in a version of thriller*
:sword Hello vowel. I'll be with you as soon as I dispatch these guys.
*performs a teleport slide behind each of the daemons, depositing a specially designed teleport tag on each*
:sword *hands the vowel a satellite device* You get to pick where these daemons go. May I suggest Venus?

[Alaric]

A "But... Venus is an unbelievably hot, sulferous world of perpetual gloom! Wouldn't the daemons be... a little too comfortable there?"

[Deaths Jester]

*returns to the foray, his arm now reattached with a large amount of duct tape, with a bottle of vodka*

"Alrighty...so let's see 'ere...what to do?  What...to...do???"

-DJ

[The Phantom Eyebrow]

* At this point the sound of the PhantomPhone echoes through the halls of the PALS mansion.  The Phantom Eyebrow's message is put through to the message minder *

:eyebrow: { Hello?  Hello... anyone there?  Pick up the phone won't you?  Look, I find myself in Paris right now on a mission and, well, I don't mind admitting to you that things could turn hairy.  I'm sure it's nothing I can't handle but perhaps it would be good experience for some of you to get some in the field practice with the Eyebrow. 

* A brief pause in the message as the Phantom shovels more coins into the phone *

:eyebrow: { Meet me on the Champs Elysees.  You'll know me, I'll be wearing a white carnation...

[Premonitioner]

* At this point the sound of the PhantomPhone echoes through the halls of the PALS mansion.  The Phantom Eyebrow's message is put through to the message minder *

:eyebrow: { Hello?  Hello... anyone there?  Pick up the phone won't you?  Look, I find myself in Paris right now on a mission and, well, I don't mind admitting to you that things could turn hairy.  I'm sure it's nothing I can't handle but perhaps it would be good experience for some of you to get some in the field practice with the Eyebrow. 

* A brief pause in the message as the Phantom shovels more coins into the phone *

:eyebrow: { Meet me on the Champs Elysees.  You'll know me, I'll be wearing a white carnation...

*Prem waits patiently as TPE hurriedly talks into the phone. A brief smile appears upon his face as he remembers a time when he didn't have telepathy and at one time, he too had to shovel coins into a pay phone.*

:prem: Are you about done? I don't mean to rush but...

*prem points up to a reddening sky*

:prem: That's usually a bad sign...and this secret phantom cult could be sacrificing someone. Maybe you have some type of phantom sensing ability or a phantom eye that you can use to like...make a connection?

*prem ponders a bit*

:prem: Or maybe I've been around Beyonder too long.

[Alaric]

The Vowel, not really knowing what he's doing, sends the deamons to some unknown place.

A "Of course, they could not long stand against my vowelish might- oh, and you helped, too, Sword."

[Deaths Jester]

* At this point the sound of the PhantomPhone echoes through the halls of the PALS mansion.  The Phantom Eyebrow's message is put through to the message minder *

:eyebrow: { Hello?  Hello... anyone there?  Pick up the phone won't you?  Look, I find myself in Paris right now on a mission and, well, I don't mind admitting to you that things could turn hairy.  I'm sure it's nothing I can't handle but perhaps it would be good experience for some of you to get some in the field practice with the Eyebrow. 

*DJ looks about trying to find where the voice of TPE is coming from*

TPE?!?!  Where are ye??  I hear ye but I can't see ye?? 

* A brief pause in the message as the Phantom shovels more coins into the phone *

:eyebrow: { Meet me on the Champs Elysees.  You'll know me, I'll be wearing a white carnation...

Okay...so to find TPE I've gotta get to Champs Elysees...now how to do that? I mean, I've got no transportation or any teleportation units or such...how am I supposed to help?  *With this DJ downs the bottle of vodka and throws it against the nearest unmoving object*

[Sword]

*sword and the verdant vowel enter the PALS Mansion, hang up their extra cloaks and sit down in front of the television.*
:sword While I check the messages Vowel, perhaps you should reacquaint yourself with Death's Jester."
*checks the messages and gets the one from TPE*
:sword A White Carnation? That's TPE code for "Trouble beyond mortal comprehension" *rushes back into the living room* DJ get the gang together. Vowel, we're needed in Paris. As soon as all available PALS members show up, we'll take the Hyper Vector to Paris.

[kkhohoho]

* At this point the sound of the PhantomPhone echoes through the halls of the PALS mansion.  The Phantom Eyebrow's message is put through to the message minder *

:eyebrow: { Hello?  Hello... anyone there?  Pick up the phone won't you?  Look, I find myself in Paris right now on a mission and, well, I don't mind admitting to you that things could turn hairy.  I'm sure it's nothing I can't handle but perhaps it would be good experience for some of you to get some in the field practice with the Eyebrow. 

* A brief pause in the message as the Phantom shovels more coins into the phone *

:eyebrow: { Meet me on the Champs Elysees.  You'll know me, I'll be wearing a white carnation...

*The message interupts Kkhohoho from his duties of kicking around the ol' cyberferret.*

:santa: "Bloody #&!!..."  *Kkhohoho takes off to the living room, laugh's at DJ's taped arm, and sees the Verdant Vowel.  Kkhohoho reconsiders going on the obvious coming rescue mission.  A while back, there was some pretty..."interesting"...stuff happening involving mutiple dimensions, which may have caused tension...of the angry kind, between the two.  Still, Kkhohoho knows that he must rescue TPB, or else, he won't get his paycheck, which he has been waiting for for quite some time."

[Alaric]

A The Phantom Eyebrow- in danger? We must hurry, my not-so-vowelish friends! Uh, could I get something to eat first?

[The Phantom Eyebrow]

:prem: That's usually a bad sign...and this secret phantom cult could be sacrificing someone. Maybe you have some type of phantom sensing ability or a phantom eye that you can use to like...make a connection?

*prem ponders a bit*

:prem: Or maybe I've been around Beyonder too long.

:eyebrow: { I do have some level of scrying ability through the Eye of Truth you know Prem.  It might allow me to try and sense what this moustachioed imposter is up to.  Give us an edge that sort of thing might. 

:eyebrow: { And with the full might of the Phantasmal Avatar League of Superheroes assembled here, we will surely both triumph and prevail!

[Spam]

:spam: *after losing the robotic rodent somewhere in North Africa, Spam finally settles back down on DJ's couch*

:spam: "So, what are we doing again?" *picks nose*

FORIAMSPAM!

[Sword]

:sword We are getting aboard the PALS Hyper Vector Jet and flying to Paris. *to the Vowel* Meal Service is provided.

[Spam]

:spam: "Meal Service! What an outrage! How dare they serve meal service!"

...

:spam: "So, does it also have an in-flight movie, or am I stuck with good food?"

FORIAMSPAM!

[Deaths Jester]

:sword We are getting aboard the PALS Hyper Vector Jet and flying to Paris. *to the Vowel* Meal Service is provided.

*utterly amazed at how fast the others have shown up, while also slightly ticked at Kkhohoho's laughter and Spammy's continous disregard to squatting on DJ couch, DJ stands in the middle of the room, unable to move about much.*  "Ummm....I hope I don't 'ave to fly this thing...I mean, come on...who wants a drunken pilot?  And whent he 'ell did we get a jet?  And why the 'ell is Spam STILL sitting on MY COUCH!!!"

*proceeds to jump Spam and throttle him with his Spammy goodness.*  "OFF....MY...COUCH!!!!"

[Spam]

*while being throttled by DJ,*

...

*wait, throttled? what does that mean? anyways, since Spam is getting "throttled," Spam burps in DJ's face, quite accidentally, since he was in fact getting THROTTLED*

:spam: "Gah... Throttled!"

FORIAMSPAM!

[The Phantom Eyebrow]

* Meanwhile, at the Arc de Triomphe *

:eyebrow: { Hold fast Prem, the PALS will soon be here.  The Eye of Truth is speaking to me...

* A furrowing of the brow as the Phantom receives a message of the happenings on board the Hyper Vector Jet (although the message does not explain how this Antediluvian organisation has managed to aquire such space age technology...) *

:eyebrow:  :huh: { I'm not sure how he's doing it, but I understand DJ and Spam are somehow optimising the jet's power by regulating the supply of fuel to the Hyper Vector engine.  I didn't know they were technically minded...

[Premonitioner]

*prem turns from the window and faces TPE...a grim expression covers his face*

:prem: I don't think we have much time to wait for the Pals brigade, sir. The sky is blood red and it looks like a meteor is about to hit us! It's aiming right for the volcano...not to mention that the hell dogs are getting a little crazy.

*prem implants an image of a Helldog barking at the sky in TPE's mind*

:prem: Do your friends have any experience with this type of thing? Because I think a bunch of fire imps just emerged out of the ground on the streets of Paris...

...

:prem: I'm sorry for getting you into this, but honestly, I had no idea that a phantom could do such things to keep a secret from being discovered.

*nearby*

:ph34r: Yessss, let's see how that so called Phantom handles this predicament.