Quickie Rant

[Tomato]

So I keep seeing people within the industry, on various comic book boards, and even members of my own family (such as from my father, who got me into comics IN THE FIRST PLACE) refer to something that just sets my blood to boil, and I just need to rant about it. I apologize to everyone for this, but I need to get this off my chest.

I am sick and tired of people referring to a rebooted Peter Parker as "returning to his roots" by making him a high school student "again." I hear that line of thought over and over again and I just want to take those people and scream at them.

PETER PARKER WAS NEVER REALLY A "HIGH SCHOOL STUDENT". HE WAS, AT BEST, SEVENTEEN WHEN HE GOT BIT BY THE SPIDER, AND WAS AT THE END OF HIS SENIOR YEAR OF HIGH SCHOOL.

In point of fact, Peter actually graduated High School VERY soon after getting his powers, in issue #28. Now, that's still a LOT (that's over two years worth of comics) but by contrast, Peter didn't graduate College until #185. Additionally, most of the people we consider mainstays of the Spider-Man supporting cast, including Harry Osborn, Mary Jane Watson, and Gwen Freaking Stacy first met Peter at ESU. The ONLY people I would consider mainstays of Peter's High School years are those that more or less followed him to ESU... namely Flash Thompson, and to a lesser extent, Liz Allen.

In fact, I would argue that a massive cross section of what are considered "classic" Spider-Man stories are those taking place AFTER Peter left High School. And even then, when I hear people refer to Peter Parker as a high school student, the implication is that he's 15 or 16... but given how soon (in comic book time) Peter graduated after gaining his powers, the dude was pretty much already an adult at the time.

I am so, SO sick of people idealizing Peter Parker as this young kid, like he was in the Ultimate series, and pretty much any version showcased in modern media. HE WAS NEVER A YOUNG HIGH SCHOOL KID. Just because you guys grew up with him when you were kids and have this idealized version of him being closer to your age, does NOT make it a reality. And it's absolutely bizarre to me because it's only really been happening within the last decade or so... The aforementioned Ultimate Spider-Man series made Peter a teenager, but even the Raimi films recognised that Peter really wasn't a high school kid at this point. And honestly, I can't think of a single piece of media prior to USM that had him as a teenager... the 90s show very specifically featured a Peter Parker that attended ESU, and even the cartoons from the 60s and 70s look as if they feature a College aged Spider-Man.

[daglob]

I think J. Michael Straczynski had him saying some thing like he was 14 when he got his powers, so it's been an ongoing process trying to de-age him and make him young enough to attract younger readers or something like that (I wonder if they have ever seen Jules Feiffer's opinion of sidekicks, which would be applicable in this case).

But I agree with you, making Peter a teenager isn't really getting him back to his roots. I kidded before about them trying to retconn the Silver Age out of existence, but maybe I wasn't far wrong.

[Talavar]

I agree 100% that Spider-man's roots were as a college rather than high school student.  That being said, I don't mind high school Spidey.  Ultimate Spider-man (the comic, not the execrable cartoon) was a pretty solid book for a long time, and the younger take on the character really worked in Captain America 3.

[Tomato]

I guess what bothers me most about the whole thing is that it's really not just a ploy by the people up top to pander to kids... I can honestly accept that, and there IS a charm to a younger Spider-Man, as we see in the ultimate series. No, what gets me is that I hear fans and outsiders both genuinely believing it... I had to choke down a similar rant when my father (who is in his 50s now and has been reading comics since he was a child) expressed the same mentality. That's why I really do think it's a memory thing, rather than something intentional... that we're so far removed from the original stories that people are smudging the details.

[Previsionary]

Pshaw. The way I remember it...

Peter Parker was a 6 year old kid who was bitten by a 12 y/o spider that grew him into an 18 y/o teen who married a 24 y/o woman who lost his 64 y/o grandmother only to make a deal with Marvel's devil to start a 2 year long BND before being replaced with a 48 y/o man who was kicked out and replaced with a 22 y/o Peter only to have a 14 y/o Peter re-emerge in various mediums. So. Yep.

[HarryTrotter]

I think hes supposed to be around 30 now in the regular universe.Somebody mentioned something like that once.
Way back when we got the news about Homecoming,I mentioned it  would be nice to see an adult Spiderman in one adaptation.But ofc,that ended with predictable results...

[GhostMachine]

I think turning him into a teenager again is a bad idea.

Going off what Daglob posted, don't trust anything J. Michael Straczynski says regarding Spider-Man. Sins Past killed all his credibility as far as that franchise is concerned.

[HarryTrotter]

JMS had a weird timeline.Time passes,but Peter doesnt age.Near the end he echoes a shot of NY from earlier,without the Twin towers,acknowleging the world has changed,but Peter is still the same.

[daglob]

Maybe he has a portrait in Stan Lee's attic?

[HarryTrotter]

Maybe he has a portrait in Stan Lee's attic?

There must be a whole gallery up there...
Actually,we know Miranda did it.She warped reality so Marvel heroes don't age.

[GhostMachine]

JMS had a weird timeline.Time passes,but Peter doesnt age.Near the end he echoes a shot of NY from earlier,without the Twin towers,acknowleging the world has changed,but Peter is still the same.

Sins Past also requires retconning, or JMS just plain doesn't understand time in comics. In the time period JMS shoehorned his plot into, Gwen was only in Europe for a couple of weeks.

JMS was brilliant with Babylon 5 and some of his other works. But when it comes to his Spider-Man work, he was a total hack.

[Tomato]

Ugh, Sins Past could be an entire rant on its own here. What's probably most frustrating is that of all the things to have been written out of continuity post-OMD, you'd think that would be an easy one, but NOPE, still canon.

That being said, there's SUCH an easy solution to that problem that would allow them to have their cake and eat it too: The whole thing is more of Norman Osborn messing with Peter. It's not like he didn't have time to set things in motion during the years he was "dead," and having MJ's memory be something he implanted either offscreen or during one of her many kidnappings/absenses wouldn't be that absurd (he's had the technology to hypnotize since the 60s). The twins are clones made using the resources of Miles Warren, which we know he had access to because of the Clone Saga.

You do that, and BAM, you get to have the Gray Goblin (I forget his name and don't care enough to look it up) still be Norman and Gwen's "son," including all the drama that entails, without the icky business of Norman doing the nasty with a girl the same age as his son.

[HarryTrotter]

Actually,JMS had a strong start and some nice idea,with the mystical origin,new enemies,Peter being a teacher in his old school.BUT Sins Past is the tipping point,after that its downhill.
IMO it was a character assasination of Gwen,just as One More Day and One Moment in Time were for Peter and MJ.