Freedom Reborn

Community Forums => Film, Television, Video and Music Discussion => Topic started by: daglob on March 05, 2017, 01:23:17 AM

Title: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: daglob on March 05, 2017, 01:23:17 AM
What is the worst movie you ever saw? Why?

There are always the old standbys, “Plan 9” and “Manos, the Hands of Fate”, but what about “Invasion of the Star Creatures”, “Bride of the Atom”, “At Long Last Love”, or “High Yellow”? Do you cringe at the antics of The Ritz Brothers, or feel queasy at anything by John Waters? Do you despise anything touched by Larry Buchanan or Ray Dennis Steckler? Maybe it's Mexican wrestler movies that turn your stomach. Or, do you have an opinion that is contrary to most? When you hear those bleeping dwarfs start up "Hi Ho", you hie yourself to a hole and hole up (all because of D&D incident back in '96). Maybe there is nothing that happened a long time ago in a galaxy far far away that you care to see.

My choice is "Curse of the Swamp Creature”. It is a truly bad movie, with little in the way of production values to recommend it. Most of the actors walk around like they are zombies, and while there is a kind of voodoo subplot, it has nothing to do with it. The only real actor, John Agar says his lines like is his tired and wants to go home. The worst offender is a guy who gets swallowed by quicksand. It is like he said to himself "with this bunch, no one is going to notice me, unless I turn the worst performance of the movie". He really tries.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: Deaths Jester on March 05, 2017, 01:42:41 AM
Okay, first off, I love "Plan 9 From Outer Space"!

As for the worst? "Godzilla's Revenge" takes it hands down. Bloody thing is super slow, every monster has been cutified to appeal to the kids, and it's so over the top campy it makes your brain hurt. This film was made to torture folks, not entertain!
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: daglob on March 05, 2017, 03:09:46 AM
Okay, first off, I love "Plan 9 From Outer Space"!

As for the worst? "Godzilla's Revenge" takes it hands down. Bloody thing is super slow, every monster has been cutified to appeal to the kids, and it's so over the top campy it makes your brain hurt. This film was made to torture folks, not entertain!

Who doesn't love "Plan 9"? It's just always on the list of "worst movies". I respect everything Ed Wood and Ray Dennis Steckler ever made; usually you can sit there and watch the things even if you keep repeating "Oh, man, this is bad" and laugh at the "serious" parts. "Godzilla's Revenge" was on Svengoolie recently (last week?), and much was made of how cute and slow everything was. I've managed to block most of it out of my mind, except for Godzookie I mean Minya talking like a cross between Beaky Buzzard and Goofy (and not in a good way).

Maybe we can do a poll if we can get up a good list.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: Deaths Jester on March 05, 2017, 04:02:00 AM
It was on last week's Svenghoolie. Tonight it's "Wolfman of London".
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: HarryTrotter on March 05, 2017, 06:02:20 AM
Oh yeah,Godzilla's Revenge was bad.The stock footage...
As for worst ever...DeepStar Six.Its not even a funny bad movie,its just a terrible ripoff of Alien.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: Deaths Jester on March 05, 2017, 07:27:19 AM
Another is "Atomic Age Vampire"...just horrid! At least I think that's the name...

Wait, it's "Alien Massacre" that I'm talking about, Atomic Age Vampire is bad but not as bad as "Alien Massacre" which has no aliens in it. Also "Alone in the T-shirt Zone" is horrid. It was billed as a comedy but there isn't anything worth laughing at.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: Tomato on March 05, 2017, 11:59:03 AM
I'm normally pretty chill with movies, since I don't go out of my way to watch anything that's truly awful* and I'm pretty forgiving of even mediocre films I have watched (I've discussed at length how I LIKED Green Lantern and am perfectly fine with Wolverine Origins). I could be snarky and say something like Batman V Superman, or X-men 3, but those aren't so much bad films as I have major issues with the content.

That said, I can safely list Godzilla 2000 and Dragonball Evolution as some of the more memorable turds. The former is easily worse, but it's so forgettable that I honestly don't remember most of it. Dragonball Evolution, by contrast, is not only a bad film in general, it's also such a betrayal of the source material I love that I disliked it far more overall, and it's about the only movie I watched specifically just to see the train wreck.

Also, honorable mention, Ang Lee's Hulk. While I remembered it being ok when I first watched it, I watched it again a few years ago because someone here was arguing how it was better than Incredible Hulk. And then I proceeded to go on a 20 minute rant about it to that person. I wouldn't put it on the same level as the two above, but it is a badly edited (and yes, I know they were going for a comic book motif, but it just comes off as trying too hard and makes the movie hard to follow sometimes. That = bad editing job) mess of a film that wants you to think it's deeper than it actually is.

*I have watched the occasional Theatre Mode on Achievement Hunter, but I didn't include any of those films because I didn't watch them, I watched AH riff them.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: HarryTrotter on March 05, 2017, 12:10:22 PM
IMO,Godzilla 2000 was pretty mediocre,but not really the worst one.Unless you watched the dub.That probably drags it down.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: Tomato on March 05, 2017, 12:25:16 PM
Wait, dub? I said the wrong one then. I meant the american Godzilla film, the one with the swarms of baby Godzillas and starring Matthew Broderick.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: HarryTrotter on March 05, 2017, 12:41:24 PM
Oh,thats the 1998 American version.Godzilla 2000 was the 1999 Japanese movie.Which,like I said,is mediocre(in a somewhat neutral sense).
-They say a monster attacked NY.
-Definitly not one of ours.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: detourne_me on March 05, 2017, 01:23:57 PM
I've seen quite a few bad movies in my day. I think one of the worst offenders is "Into the Woods" such a promising cast, but blegh. Another would be "The Counseler" a stellar cast with an absolute garbage script. I can't really blame B-movies, but when it comes to A-list talent, those movies are just inexcusable. Other offenders would be some of View Askew's movies, like Yoga Hosers or Vulgar.  Ugh.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: SickAlice on March 05, 2017, 02:09:23 PM
I'm in the same vein as DM where I tend to look at a movies budget and whose working on it, then what they managed to accomplish with it. If a movies budget was say a couple hundred dollars but they got as creative as they could and the unseasoned no-names managed to recall their lines I feel they delivered yet if one has a massive budget and top billing yet fails, well you get the idea. Mommy Dearest tends to stand high on my list just for being pro-child abuse. Bill Cosby's Leonard Part 6 was a straight up flunk imo.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: catwhowalksbyhimself on March 05, 2017, 02:22:41 PM
The Spirit continues to be my standard for bad movies, although I must confess I refused to watch past 10 or 15 minutes of it, so it might get better later.  I really doubt that though.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: Glitch Girl on March 05, 2017, 04:01:00 PM
I'm trying to think of one that didn't even transcend the "So bad it becomes comedy" line that I've sat through the whole way.

I  mean I've seen a few that was so bad it was hilarious.  "Battlefield Earth" and "Mac&Me" come to mind, as does "Birddemic". 

And then are movies I can't sit through they're so awful.  "Avatar: The Last Airbender" comes to mind.  I can't even make it 15 minutes in.

I think "Batman & Robin" is probably the worst I've sat through to the bitter BITTER end.  Even though it's cool to pick on it, to me, it failed at camp, it failed at adventure, it failed in production design, it failed in script... it's just one massive fail.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: HarryTrotter on March 05, 2017, 04:03:31 PM
The Spirit continues to be my standard for bad movies, although I must confess I refused to watch past 10 or 15 minutes of it, so it might get better later.  I really doubt that though.
You mean Sin City 1,5?
I remembered something that's going to be hard to top.Now,part 3 war terrible,but Jaws the Revenge really sets new standards for cr@p.Like,why is Michael Caine in this movie?Hes a good actor.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: Deaths Jester on March 05, 2017, 04:59:59 PM
Right up there with "Godzilla's Revenge" is "Howard the Duck"! If you've ever seen it, you know why it stinks.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: spydermann93 on March 05, 2017, 05:37:39 PM
As a fan of MST3K, I've seen waaay more than I can count, but I would have to say "Manos: The Hands of Fate" is still one of the worst. Great commentary, though :P

In an actual theater, though, I would maybe say the one movie that I disliked the most at first viewing "Rise of the Silver Surfer". Just all-around disappointing and I'm still sad that Galactus was just a giant fart-cloud.

And gosh, "Godzilla's Revenge". I'm a big fan of Godzilla, but that movie was just dumb. I don't care about Minilla! Show me Godzilla, dang it!

I give movies like "Samurai Cop," "Birddemic," and "The Room" a pass since they were at least enjoyable to watch. They were bad, sure, but they at least made me laugh with how cheesy they were.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: HarryTrotter on March 05, 2017, 07:46:31 PM
(https://media0.giphy.com/media/VIZtO9GmgTp4s/200_s.gif)
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: spydermann93 on March 05, 2017, 07:58:55 PM
Flower Lady: "Oh, hai, Johnny. I didn't know it was you."

Same flower lady 5 seconds later: "You're my favorite customer."

Then how did you not know who he was!?! :wacko:

Such great dialog :lol:
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: HarryTrotter on March 05, 2017, 08:04:00 PM
Nostalgia critic: You didnt recognize him?You didnt recognize a girly French zombie until he took off his sunglases?!
And a personal favorite: I cant tell you,its confidential.Anyway,how is your sex life? :D
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: Ouflah on March 06, 2017, 01:03:42 AM
I haven't watched a lot of bad movies, but I did watch Dune... it was part of a 4 DVD set that was $5 (we bought it because one of the DVDs was Flash Gordon, which I like quite a bit).

I don't even know why I stuck through and watched the whole thing. I hated it.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: daglob on March 06, 2017, 02:00:54 AM
Yeah, I think Dune is one of those movies that the director or somebody thought he knew how to improve the story. That reminds me of The Man Who Fell To Earth; the movie bears only a superficial resemblance to the book.

But, then again, the same can be said about Who Framed Roger Rabbit (and the movie is better in this case).

And then there's Damnation Alley and/or Survival Run...
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: spydermann93 on March 06, 2017, 02:12:12 AM
Yeah, I think Dune is one of those movies that the director or somebody thought he knew how to improve the story. That reminds me of The Man Who Fell To Earth; the movie bears only a superficial resemblance to the book.

But, then again, the same can be said about Who Framed Roger Rabbit (and the movie is better in this case).

And then there's Damnation Alley and/or Survival Run...

Speaking of movies that "bear only a superficial reference to the book", Starship Troopers is one of my FAVORITE movies.

All of the sequels, however, can burn. Not one of them could be considered "good" nor "ok".
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: kkhohoho on March 06, 2017, 05:29:32 AM
Hm. I've seen plenty of reviews of bad movies thanks to the wonders of the internet, and have seen a number of MST3K eps, but in terms of things I've actually seen without some helpful humorous commentary to ease the pain, the first Ghost in the Shell movie from back in the 90's comes to mind. For better or worse, it's the predecessor to the Matrix movies, and since I don't give a crap about any of the Matrix movies, (not even the first one,) it's probably for the worse. Just like the Matrix, the characters are lifeless, the story is pretentious bullcrap, and everything that comes out of the characters' mouths is faux-philosophical nonsense. But what puts this above the Matrix in terms of being sucky instead of just OK is that it not only does all of this even worse than the Matrix did, but it takes a preexisting work and craps all over it to do so. In the original manga, (and in Stand Alone Complex later on,) the characters weren't empty mouthpieces. They had life, personality, vigor. In the manga, the Major was a loudmouthed spitfire who later grew into a stoic, no-nonsense professional who still had her moments of levity, while Baoto was a fun-loving dude with the occasional serious moment from start to finish. And it's more or less the same with everyone else. Likewise, the story in the manga wasn't pretentious drivel; it was straight-forward action and intrigue up until near the very end, and there was nothing wrong with that. But then the movie did its' best to make sure it was pretentious drivel while also choosing not to give it a third act, and the result is the mess we've got today. I know plenty of people still love it, and I can understand why, but that doesn't change the fact that its' just a soulless mess.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: detourne_me on March 06, 2017, 05:53:46 AM
And then there's Damnation Alley and/or Survival Run...

Was damnation alley the post apocalyptic one with Ernest Borgnine and a giant truck?
Dune was a rather tough movie too. David Lynch ended up taking his name off the final product, and it was released as an Alan Smithee film. I did love it as a kid, though, Sting and the Harkonen's were creepy, Partrick Stewart as Gurney was pretty cool.
It's a shame Alejandro Jodorowsky never got to make his version of Dune.
Check out the documentary Jodorowsky's Dune if you ever want to know what could've been the greatest sci-if ever. Music from Pink Floyd and Tangerine Dream, concepts and designs from Moebius, HR Geiger and Dan O'Bannon (creator of Alien), and starring Orson Welles and Salvador Dali.
I really hope Denis Villeneuve succeeds with Blade Runner later this year, and gets an unlimited budget for Dune.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: HarryTrotter on March 06, 2017, 06:02:08 AM
I know its a sacred cow for some people,but the book wasn't that great either.Its a colonial narrative with some uncomfortable real life parallels,at best.
It did produce some great RTS games,but the credit goes to people at Westwood there.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: Silver Shocker on March 06, 2017, 01:41:02 PM
The Spirit continues to be my standard for bad movies, although I must confess I refused to watch past 10 or 15 minutes of it, so it might get better later.  I really doubt that though.
You mean Sin City 1,5?
I remembered something that's going to be hard to top.Now,part 3 war terrible,but Jaws the Revenge really sets new standards for cr@p.Like,why is Michael Caine in this movie?Hes a good actor.

Money dear boy.

Quote from: Micheal Caine
"I have never seen the film, but by all accounts it was terrible. However, I have seen the house that it built, and it is terrific!"

As for me. I've seen Batman and Robin, and that was certainly bad. The Village was pretty bad. I've seen Sharknado, which was a bad movie, but enjoyably so. The live action Death Note spin-off "L: Change the World" was pretty terrible. Other than that, I can't really think of any more. I just don't watch a lot of really bad movies.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: daglob on March 06, 2017, 04:10:01 PM
Damnation Alley and Survival Run are both stories by Roger Zelazny. It's my understanding that Damnation Alley is the expanded version of Survival Run, and that neither has anything to do with a later movie called Survival Run. In my opinion, neither has much to do with the movie called Damnation Alley, either. That is the only movie I ever walked out on (and I wanted to walk out on The Man Who Fell To Earth).
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: HarryTrotter on March 06, 2017, 07:16:29 PM
The Spirit continues to be my standard for bad movies, although I must confess I refused to watch past 10 or 15 minutes of it, so it might get better later.  I really doubt that though.
You mean Sin City 1,5?
I remembered something that's going to be hard to top.Now,part 3 war terrible,but Jaws the Revenge really sets new standards for cr@p.Like,why is Michael Caine in this movie?Hes a good actor.

Money dear boy.

Quote from: Micheal Caine
"I have never seen the film, but by all accounts it was terrible. However, I have seen the house that it built, and it is terrific!"

As for me. I've seen Batman and Robin, and that was certainly bad. The Village was pretty bad. I've seen Sharknado, which was a bad movie, but enjoyably so. The live action Death Note spin-off "L: Change the World" was pretty terrible. Other than that, I can't really think of any more. I just don't watch a lot of really bad movies.
Rhetorical question.I assumed as much.
Well,we mentioned live action anime adaptation earlier.We have yet to touch upon horror sequels and video game adaptations.:)
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: BentonGrey on March 06, 2017, 09:38:44 PM
Haha, this thread is great!  I definitely agree with the folks who judge big budget, big talent films more harshly than B-movies.  Pointing out that Manos: The Hands of Fate is bad is kind of like saying that the sky is blue.  I'm a huge MST3K fan, like some of the rest of y'all, and there's a wide range of movies that are in the 'so bad it's good' category.  Just in the Rifftrax films we've seen recently, Samurai Cop and R.O.T.O.R. were both just unbelievably bad, hysterically, die-from-laughing kind of bad.  But what else would you expect from such a movie.  There badness is practically transcendent.

For my part, in terms of the 'real' movies I've seen, I'd have to say the worst would be either The Good Shepard, The Fountain, or Elysium.  These are three films with tons of potential, tons of talent, big budgets, and execrable writing, terrible acting, and a profusion of pseudo-profound but incredibly ill-conceived BS.  I suppose the Good Shepard would have to be the worst, as it wasn't even entertaining or interesting, but the squandered opportunity of the other two galls me to no end.  (I realize there are two Matt Damon movies on there, but I really do like the guy, honest!  :P)

Of course, other movies mentioned here are undoubtedly objectively worse, like Battlefield: Earth and the '98 Godzilla, but there's something about 'from those to whom much is given, much is expected' about this question for me.

Also, I'm surprised by the Dune hate.  Dune was a great movie, a sci-fi classic!  It's one of the very few instances where I'd say the movie improves on the book, thanks to Herbert's aggressively mediocre writing.  His ideas, his world is great, the rest...not so much.  While the film cut out most of the ambiguity of Paul's ascension, it told a better, more complete story.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: Ouflah on March 06, 2017, 10:43:37 PM
To be fair, I did get some enjoyment from watching Dune. Specifically, this line (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B8-eiBqri0U) has become a running joke in my family, except since none of us can pronounce "Kwisatz Haderach," we just swapped that out for "Cheese Danish."
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: spydermann93 on March 07, 2017, 01:38:49 AM
Pointing out that Manos: The Hands of Fate is bad is kind of like saying that the sky is blue.

Good! We're in agreement, then :lol:

I know it's kind of cheating to give that answer, but it is the worst movie that I have ever seen. :P


Just in the Rifftrax films we've seen recently, Samurai Cop and R.O.T.O.R. were both just unbelievably bad, hysterically, die-from-laughing kind of bad.  But what else would you expect from such a movie.  There badness is practically transcendent.

My family and I just saw that Samurai Cop Rifftrax last week. Hilarious! It was the perfect blend of horrendously cheesy, being way too serious with itself, and hilarious dialog. Such a fun movie to watch, made all the better by the goldies from MST3K.

Also, have you seen the Titanic (yes, the famous one) Rifftrax, Benton? That was pretty great, too. Oh, and Saviors of the Lost Universe is good too, if you like D&D-type stories. Cheesey and goofy, but somewhat endearing.

Of course, other movies mentioned here are undoubtedly objectively worse, like Battlefield: Earth and the '98 Godzilla, but there's something about 'from those to whom much is given, much is expected' about this question for me.

Oh, God! I forgot about that one! I think my brain physically erased that movie from my memory to spare me the pain. Oh, it hurts! :lastmohican

To be fair, I did get some enjoyment from watching Dune. Specifically, this line (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B8-eiBqri0U) has become a running joke in my family, except since none of us can pronounce "Kwisatz Haderach," we just swapped that out for "Cheese Danish."

Oh, that's easy. It's pronounced "Kwisatz" and "Haderach". See? Easy!
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: BentonGrey on March 07, 2017, 01:54:57 AM
Haha, it's a completely legitimate choice, Spyder.  It is a really, truly terrible movie.  :D

We loved Prisoners of the Lost Universe!  The Green Man who was actually blue and all the other ridiculous absurdity of that movie was great.

We haven't seen the Titanic one.  We tend not to do the 'just the riffs' ones for logistical reasons.

It's easy to understand how your brain might erase Battlefield: Earth.  Mine had too until I saw it mentioned in this thread!  :P
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: spydermann93 on March 07, 2017, 02:05:45 AM
Haha, it's a completely legitimate choice, Spyder.  It is a really, truly terrible movie.  :D

We loved Prisoners of the Lost Universe!  The Green Man who was actually blue and all the other ridiculous absurdity of that movie was great.

We haven't seen the Titanic one.  We tend not to do the 'just the riffs' ones for logistical reasons.

It's easy to understand how your brain might erase Battlefield: Earth.  Mine had too until I saw it mentioned in this thread!  :P

Was it Prisoners? Cuz that sounds exactly like the one I saw! I was like "Is he green? Dad, is he green or am I color blind? Nah, he's blue." I almost died with the army of Palpatines, haha :lol:

And yeah, I get what you're saying about "just the riffs". The all-in-ones are pretty convient :P
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: BentonGrey on March 07, 2017, 02:15:41 AM
Yeah, I looked it up to figure out if the guy was green but called blue or blue but called green.  Haha!  Ohh man, I forgot the army of Plapatines!  That was a great bit!
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: SickAlice on March 07, 2017, 02:48:35 AM
I thought on it a little and I think at least for 2016 Nine Lives took it for me. I started playing with my bootlaces and such out of boredom. As a rule Kevin Spacey can usually save anything but not that one. Worst I ever paid for at the theater was Monkey Trouble. My friend and I ended up playing with a deck of cards on the floor by the lights. I grant myself the excuse that I was taking kids to that one though.

The live action Guyver movie sticks out as one with a budget that just...eesh. Some people have a special place for that one, I know. Much like I have a special place for Garbage Pail Kids The Movie but I won't front on behalf of that and say it was nicely done either. Though that had about as much going in for it as Ghoulies Go to College did so the bar wasn't really set high to begin with either.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: Deaths Jester on March 07, 2017, 03:15:55 AM
Since I forgot them, most movie versions of D+D have stunk horrendously as did the Dungeon Siege movie.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: HarryTrotter on March 07, 2017, 05:37:47 AM
Uwe Boll,that all Im going to say.
Thou,Far Cry was pretty hilarious.Hilariocity,as Stuckmann would say.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: Glitch Girl on March 09, 2017, 04:55:12 PM
Since I forgot them, most movie versions of D+D have stunk horrendously as did the Dungeon Siege movie.
Oh I forgot about the D&D movie back in 2000.  I literally felt dumber after it was all over.  Even chewing the scenery like a fine steak Jeremy Irons couldn't save that fil.  Unfortunately, one of my friends couldn't get over the guy in the blue lipstick and brought it up for months... nay YEARS later. 
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: BWPS on March 09, 2017, 09:38:45 PM
I know its a sacred cow for some people,but the book wasn't that great either.Its a colonial narrative with some uncomfortable real life parallels,at best.
It did produce some great RTS games,but the credit goes to people at Westwood there.

I hate you. Here's an emoticon so this comment seems tongue in cheek:  :P


I don't know if anyone remembers a company called Moonbeam Entertainment but they made direct to video fantasy movies for kids and they're just so cringe-inducing. My dad rented us one once and even as kids we had a very visceral reaction. So of course he kept renting them just to troll us. Prehysteria!, Dragonworld, Beanstalk, Josh Kirby Time Warrior, just really awful acting and effects in all of them.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: Panther_Gunn on March 10, 2017, 03:01:06 AM
Since I forgot them, most movie versions of D+D have stunk horrendously as did the Dungeon Siege movie.
Oh I forgot about the D&D movie back in 2000.  I literally felt dumber after it was all over.  Even chewing the scenery like a fine steak Jeremy Irons couldn't save that fil.  Unfortunately, one of my friends couldn't get over the guy in the blue lipstick and brought it up for months... nay YEARS later.

I can never forget.  It was like my 'Nam.

I was the only sane one in our gaming group.  I knew it was going to be a trainwreck, but the rest of the group practically dragged me to see it with them.  At least I had the satisfaction of the "I told you so"s when it was over.  I still wonder just how much of Gary Gygax's soul curdled every time that aired.

My first entry to this lovely subject, aside from the obvious D&D, Matthew Broderick "Godzilla", and Battlefield Earth, is Tom Cruise's War of the Worlds.  Such a huge budget and potential wasted on such a sub-par and mediocre storyline (if it can even be called that).  It would have been better off it they had called it something else unrelated to the original (much like D&D and Godzilla).  At least none of them would have crushed expectations that way.

I'd also like to add to the list the film version of the play Cats.  That's a chunk of my life I'll never get back.  I couldn't give a rat's patootie about the skill of the singing and/or dancing, but if you're going to drape that talent around a story, at least make it intelligible and engaging.  It was completely vapid and without merit, and it felt like listening to Enya trying to sing like Celine Dion.  Have I mentioned that I didn't like it?
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: kkhohoho on March 10, 2017, 03:20:32 AM
I'd also like to add to the list the film version of the play Cats.  That's a chunk of my life I'll never get back.  I couldn't give a rat's patootie about the skill of the singing and/or dancing, but if you're going to drape that talent around a story, at least make it intelligible and engaging.  It was completely vapid and without merit, and it felt like listening to Enya trying to sing like Celine Dion.  Have I mentioned that I didn't like it?

...I liked it. :(
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: daglob on March 10, 2017, 04:36:44 AM
We all have our guilty pleasures... ;)
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: kkhohoho on March 10, 2017, 06:12:23 AM
We all have our guilty pleasures... ;)

No, seriously, I thought it was a genuinely good movie. No 'guilty' to be had; just pure pleasure. It had good characters, great music, and a really nice atmosphere. It was kind of magical. It may not have had much of a plot, but the plot wasn't the point. It was just a wonderfully enchanting time, and there's nothing wrong with that. Then again, this is coming from a Theater major, so I may be more than a bit biased. ;)
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: HarryTrotter on March 10, 2017, 06:25:21 AM
I know its a sacred cow for some people,but the book wasn't that great either.Its a colonial narrative with some uncomfortable real life parallels,at best.
It did produce some great RTS games,but the credit goes to people at Westwood there.

I hate you.
You have the right.But the only good part of the franchise were the RTS games,and that stands. ;)
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: Shogunn2517 on March 11, 2017, 05:35:00 AM
So I've heard some say some movies are "so bad they become comedy."

But there's on ONE movie that is so GOD-FREAKING detestable that it makes me want to punch my TV.

Troll 2

Okay, I know what some may think. "Well, the originally Troll was just as bad if not worse." No.  Original troll had Michael Moriaty(Law and Order), Jenny Beck(Star Child from V) and Sonny Bono, Julia Louie-Dryfus, Noah Hathaway(Atreyu from NeverEnding Story) and his name was Harry Potter.  Richard Band did a kick arse job composing, as he did with practically anything he touched in the 1980s.  Plus, I saw it when I was like 5 and everything STAYS awesome when you see it at that age.

Troll 2 however was ESPECIALLY dreadful.  It look like someone paid money to ruin that movie.  And that money was used for the films budget, which had to be no more than 100 bucks.  I don't even think I made it through.  I had to give it a chance because it was afterall a sequel to something I held dear to my heart, but that was the Stupidest. Movie. Ever. Period.  Of all time.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: kkhohoho on March 11, 2017, 06:24:46 AM
So I've heard some say some movies are "so bad they become comedy."

But there's on ONE movie that is so GOD-FREAKING detestable that it makes me want to punch my TV.

Troll 2

Okay, I know what some may think. "Well, the originally Troll was just as bad if not worse." No.  Original troll had Michael Moriaty(Law and Order), Jenny Beck(Star Child from V) and Sonny Bono, Julia Louie-Dryfus, Noah Hathaway(Atreyu from NeverEnding Story) and his name was Harry Potter.  Richard Band did a kick arse job composing, as he did with practically anything he touched in the 1980s.  Plus, I saw it when I was like 5 and everything STAYS awesome when you see it at that age.

Troll 2 however was ESPECIALLY dreadful.  It look like someone paid money to ruin that movie.  And that money was used for the films budget, which had to be no more than 100 bucks.  I don't even think I made it through.  I had to give it a chance because it was afterall a sequel to something I held dear to my heart, but that was the Stupidest. Movie. Ever. Period.  Of all time.

Oh my GOOOOOOOOOOO--
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: GhostMachine on March 11, 2017, 06:44:46 PM
NEON DEMON

I'm thoroughly convinced that everyone who created the movie (writer, director, producers, camera man, etc) were all on drugs....or needed to be...and that all the actors either owed favors or really needed the money. What's worse is that Keanu Reeves is in it briefly. (He's in about 2 or 3 scenes, but they're short. I doubt he's in it more than 5 minutes total, if that.)

Uwe Boll looks like a frickin' genius compared to the people behind this movie. It has no redeeming qualities whatsoever, other than having a few very attractive actresses in it. Anyone involved would be wise to leave this stinker off their resume, and even an MST3K treatment wouldn't make it worth checking out. (Seriously. If the new version of MST3K coming to Netflix ever does this film, I'll skip that episode. Its THAT bad.)
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: kkhohoho on March 11, 2017, 08:01:43 PM
What's worse is that Keanu Reeves is in it briefly. (He's in about 2 or 3 scenes, but they're short. I doubt he's in it more than 5 minutes total, if that.)

Whoa.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: HarryTrotter on March 15, 2017, 07:15:26 PM
Something I forgot to mention,Conan,the 2011. version.What a CGI cr@pfest.Its like watching somebody else play a very stupid video game.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: spydermann93 on March 16, 2017, 01:05:25 AM
Yeah... it wasn't too great. I actually completely forgot about it until you mentioned it just now.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: daglob on March 16, 2017, 01:15:11 AM
I had forgotten a real rotter, The Man Who Fell to Earth, but its' coming on Comet tonight reminded me. While it has pretty much the same plot as the book, it is the lousiest adaptation of any kind I have ever seen. Only the absolute lack of any kind of competency makes me dislike Curse of the Swamp Creature more. Nicholas Roeg, after all, could take pretty pictures. Then again, the same could be said for Raymond Dennis Steckler...
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: kkhohoho on March 16, 2017, 01:42:05 AM
So I'm probably the only person on this whole darn board who's seen this one, but other than GitS, Awakening of the Trailblazer has to be one of the worst anime movies I've ever seen. (Hence why most people on this board had never seen it, what with it being an anime and all.) It's the movie for Gundam 00, a series that aired back in the late Early Oughties, and while it was far from perfect, (the second half especially,) it was still leagues better than this. I'm sure everyone has a perfectly decent series of some sort they've seen that ends up completely nuking itself by the end, and the 00 movie does just that. While it's well animated and has a pretty nice soundtrack all things considered, the story is is bland and banal as all hell, and if it's ever interesting, it's for all the wrong reasons.

But the movie really shoots itself in the foot in the ending. Long story short, it tries to shove its' message of understanding being a panacea to solving all of mankinds' ills and that violence is never the answer down our collective throats; nevermind that in the actual show, (where they still started to lean towards that particular message by the end, but whatever,) violence turned out to be the freaking answer. Most Gundam shows tell you that while understanding can promote or even ensure peace, it can just as easily make things even worse. After all, if two people just happen to hate each other, understanding why they both hate one another might just make them hate each other all the more, as the franchise has pointed out on more than once occasion. If worst comes to worst, as it often can, you need to be willing to fight, even if only as a last resort. So to attempt to plant this rainbow-coated message of peace and understanding being a be-all end-all solution despite the very franchise it belongs to having made it very clear that this isn't the case is nothing short of rage-inducing idiocy. And they also killed off more than one character completely pointlessly, which more or less destroyed any possible good will the film may or may not have had left. In short, this movie can go jump in Cleveland's fiery waters of hell for all I care. (No, seriously. Cleveland's river has been on freaking fire. Several times. Go look it up.)
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: daglob on March 16, 2017, 04:25:11 AM
Cuyahoga.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: Panther_Gunn on March 16, 2017, 04:57:20 AM
I'm sure everyone has a perfectly decent series of some sort they've seen that ends up completely nuking itself by the end

Hmmmm....that sounds an awful lot like what CN did to Teen Titans with Teen Titans Go.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: HarryTrotter on March 16, 2017, 05:34:58 AM
Yeah,Awakening of the Trailblazer was kinda pointless.What most fans hold against it however,were aliens.Never before,or after,have there been aliens present in the whole franchise.Except that space whale fossil in SEED,but thats a different story.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: kkhohoho on March 16, 2017, 02:19:07 PM
Yeah,Awakening of the Trailblazer was kinda pointless.What most fans hold against it however,were aliens.Never before,or after,have there been aliens present in the whole franchise.Except that space whale fossil in SEED,but thats a different story.

First off, I have to say, I am SO happy that I am not the only person on this board who actually watches anime, much less Gundam. You sir have made my day. :)

Anyhoo, no, the aliens weren't my problem with it. (Mostly.) I thought they were actually pretty well-handled, or at least much better than they could have been. They were alluded and built up to a number of times in the series proper ('the dialogues to come'), and when they actually showed, they weren't fully sentient alien invaders in spacesuits and rayguns like out of, say, nearly any other mech show with aliens. They were completely alien and nigh-incomprehensible, and presented with the sort of realism (or as much realism as one could expect from aliens, or from a franchise that stars psychic mech-wielding children on a regular basis,) that permeats the rest of the franchise. No, the problems were the fact that the movie was just so pointless, and that it completely shot itself in the foot by the end. That said, there was one little (okay, huge,) issue I had with the aliens, which was all of them turning into a giant freaking space-flower in the last five minutes. All that did was make the film's 'message', and in turn its' ending, even stupider than it already was, and that's saying a lot.

Cuyahoga.

...Wut?
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: HarryTrotter on March 16, 2017, 02:50:31 PM
I didn't have that much of a problem with aliens either,but I know plenty of people who did.00 was never really my favorite so I cant really muster any strong feelings for the movie.Aaaaaaand there were sadly a lot worst things in the franchise then AoT.As hard it is for me to pick the highest point(Zeta),its also hard to pick its nadir.SEED Destiny?AGE?Reconguista?So many choices...
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: daglob on March 16, 2017, 05:00:59 PM
Kkhohoho: the Cuyahoga River catches fire every once in awhile. Back in the '6os, anyway. REM did a song.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: Deaths Jester on March 16, 2017, 05:06:39 PM
Kkhohoho: the Cuyahoga River catches fire every once in awhile. Back in the '6os, anyway. REM did a song.

It still does on occasion...mainly due to the amount of pollution in in.  IF someone were to get a match near Boston Harbor the same would probably happen...
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: kkhohoho on March 16, 2017, 06:35:18 PM
Kkhohoho: the Cuyahoga River catches fire every once in awhile. Back in the '6os, anyway. REM did a song.

Well, I knew that. I just didn't know the name. Thanks for clearing that up.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: daglob on March 29, 2017, 07:40:24 PM
Comet does it again...

Tonight they are showing Dracula vs. Frankenstein, a movie notable for its' mod Frank Zappa lookalike Dracula, mush-faced Frankenstein, a cameo by Forrest J. Ackerman, Angelo Rossitto as a dwarf, and, sadly, what I am told are the last professional performances by  J. Carroll Naish and Lon Chaney Jr. It's not "so bad it's good" bad, just plain "bad" bad. The story is that it is made from an unfinished movie called The Blood Seekers, one of those movies were a mad scientist beneficiary of humanity has to murder young women for the betterment of mankind (HOW many times have they used that as an excuse? I've lost track). Additional scenes with Drac and Frank were shot to fill out the time, and there you go. A little like The Incredible Melting Man, but without the few remaining funny scenes. I've read that some feel that what appeal it has is that the scenes change so fast, the action flows so quickly, and some of the performances are so goofy that you can't help but like it. I don't agree.

Still, when trying to decide what the worst movie I ever saw is, The Curse of the Swamp Creature is the first movie that shambles into mind.

In the middle of writing this, the page reset, erasing my post.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: Panther_Gunn on March 30, 2017, 02:00:46 AM
In the middle of writing this, the page reset, erasing my post.

Obviously the board agreed that it was so bad that it couldn't bear to admit it exists.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: dudalb on April 06, 2017, 09:34:17 PM
The Spirit continues to be my standard for bad movies, although I must confess I refused to watch past 10 or 15 minutes of it, so it might get better later.  I really doubt that though.

It was even worse if you are a fan of Will Eisner's brilliant creation. If there was ever a case of somebody not really getting the Source material, it was Frank Miller and The Spirit. 
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: BentonGrey on April 06, 2017, 09:47:00 PM
There's a hot competition for that distinction these days.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: dudalb on April 06, 2017, 09:52:38 PM
There's a hot competition for that distinction these days.

And the 1995 Demi Moore film of "The Scarlet Letter" is certainly in the competition. It has a happy ending. That should tell you all you need to know about how bad it is.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: dudalb on April 06, 2017, 09:53:58 PM
And let us not forget "The Room", the film which made Tommy Wiseau the Ed Wood for the New Century. Think Ed Wood with intellectual pretensions.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: BentonGrey on April 06, 2017, 09:58:16 PM
Ha, wow, The Scarlet Letter with a happy ending.  That's like the 40s version of Moby Dick where Ahab kills the whale and goes home to get hitched (proof that this isn't just a modern phenomenon!).
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: dudalb on April 06, 2017, 10:19:53 PM
In the 1995 movie of The Scarlet Letter, Hester runs off with Arthur Dimmesdale to Carolina at the end, to live happily ever after. I kid you not.
I guess that the novel is a tragedy went over the heads of the writer and producers......
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: dudalb on April 06, 2017, 10:22:49 PM
Kkhohoho: the Cuyahoga River catches fire every once in awhile. Back in the '6os, anyway. REM did a song.

Cleveland's greatest recurring disaster. Except for the Cleveland Browns.... :D
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: daglob on April 19, 2017, 05:20:03 PM
Comet does it again:

They have Mars Needs Women in rotation. And here I discover it's by Larry Buchanan, which explains a lot (never had enough interest to check it out before).

Buchanan was tasked with taking B&W monster movies from the '50s and making color versions for television distribution. I'm not sure what the deal was, whether they thought color made them better, or they thought that they  could pass them off as "new", or if they thought that people would actually avoid B&W movies on color TV stations.

Buchanan made the following (among a few others):


The Eye Creatures (remake of Invasion of the Saucer Men)

Zontar, the Thing From Venus (remake of It Conquered the World, with the dreaded rutabaga monster)

Creature of Destruction (remake of The She-Creature, about a prehistoric reptilian blonde hottie with big bazoongas)

In the Year 2889 (remake of The Day the World Ended)

Curse of the Swamp Creature (which is a kind of remake of a movie called Voodoo Woman)

It's Alive (no relation to the 1974 monster movie of the same name, the plot synopsis reads like a composite of The Valley of Gwangi and Beast from Haunted Cave)

Hell Raiders (possibly original, but that may not help it)

The Lock Ness Horror (much to my surprise, I kinda liked this one)

Mars Needs Women (which bears a certain resemblance to Teenagers from Outer Space and an assortment of other movies which escaped into distribution)

 I may be unfair to Buchanan; perhaps he didn't want to make the remakes listed above, and it is pretty certain that he had little or no budget to make them with.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: Deaths Jester on April 19, 2017, 06:31:41 PM
Mars Needs Women was originally made in 1967 by AIP.

The Eye Creatures comes from 1965 and was a made-for-tele movie, also known as Attack of the The Eye Creatures.

Zontar was another tele movie done in 1966.'

In the Year 2889 was 1967, and a tele movie...see a theme here from Buchanan....

It's Alive made it to film in '69. The creature was reused in Buchanan's Creature of Destruction flop.

He did Hell Raiders for AIP in '68 a rip off of a bunch of WW 2 movies done around that time.

The Lock Ness Horror was an '81 idie film that Larry wrote with Lyn Schubert.  It was filmed in Lake Tahoe, Calif and the Nessie puppet (just a head on a stick) was later used as Jack the Ripper in one of the "**** or Not?" segments in "Amazon Women on the Moon".




There are a few other Buchanan films you're missing there, DG, but I'll let you go looking for them....it's more fun when you stumble on them yourself.

Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: kaflinkle_rises on May 04, 2017, 10:19:37 PM
There are too many obvious ones, Jaws 4, Robocop 3 (one was fantastic, 2 so-so, but 3 made me want to punch myself in the face), Battlefield Earth, etc, but one of the biggest disappointments for me was the second Sin City film. It didn't have any of the style or soul of the original.

On the flip side of this, one of my favourite films is The Man from Earth made in 2007. I love that film but most people I know are bored to tears watching it.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: Silver Shocker on May 04, 2017, 11:25:48 PM
Yeah,Awakening of the Trailblazer was kinda pointless.What most fans hold against it however,were aliens.Never before,or after,have there been aliens present in the whole franchise.Except that space whale fossil in SEED,but thats a different story.

First off, I have to say, I am SO happy that I am not the only person on this board who actually watches anime, much less Gundam. You sir have made my day. :)

I watch the anime, including Gundam. I just recently watched the first season of Iron Blooded Orphans. As for the Gundam 00 film, I only saw it once years ago and my memory of it is pretty poor. I don't really remember what I thought of it but I don't think I hated it. I'd have to watch it again to tel you what I think of it now.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: GhostMachine on May 05, 2017, 01:13:51 AM
The worst film I ever saw in a theater was Krull, with Masters Of The Universe a close second. The worst I've seen on cable, dvd or Blu-Ray (not counting Mystery Science Theater 3000 or intentionally bad cult films) would have to be Neon Demon. As I can't say how I really feel about it here, since its a family friendly board, I'll simply say its time wasted that I'll never get back. If Keanu Reeves being in it is an attraction for you, let me save you the trouble by telling you that he's in it less than 5 minutes total, in two different scenes, and only has one or two lines (maybe three, at most). Its one of those movies where everyone involved either needed money or owed favors, and the writer and director were either heavily on drugs or needed to be. Absolute garbage.

(Edited my post because I previously had Jupiter Ascending listed instead. But Neon Demon makes it look like a 5-star Academy Award winner by comparison.)

There are too many obvious ones, Jaws 4, Robocop 3 (one was fantastic, 2 so-so, but 3 made me want to punch myself in the face), Battlefield Earth, etc, but one of the biggest disappointments for me was the second Sin City film. It didn't have any of the style or soul of the original.

On the flip side of this, one of my favourite films is The Man from Earth made in 2007. I love that film but most people I know are bored to tears watching it.

My biggest problem with the second Sin City was them trying to make Josh Brolin look more like Clive Owen through the use of makeup and prosthetics, since Clive Owen was unable to appear for the post-plastic surgery part of the film. Would have been better off not showing Dwight's face at all (or used stock footage for a quick glimpse and shown him in shadow).

Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: kkhohoho on May 05, 2017, 01:58:13 AM
Yeah,Awakening of the Trailblazer was kinda pointless.What most fans hold against it however,were aliens.Never before,or after,have there been aliens present in the whole franchise.Except that space whale fossil in SEED,but thats a different story.

First off, I have to say, I am SO happy that I am not the only person on this board who actually watches anime, much less Gundam. You sir have made my day. :)

I'd have to watch it again--

DON'T. DO. IT. Trust me, you'll thank me later. ;)
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: Shogunn2517 on October 24, 2017, 05:36:17 PM
For whatever reason this thread popped up on my browser so I thought I might reiterate my hate for that garbage waste of film reel that was troll 2.  I'm not sure how clear I was before but I really really really hate that movie.  Like furiously hate it.  Like if I ever come across anyone who had anything to do with the making of that movie I will probably  do harm to them.  Why did they even do it? What were they thinking about?  What were they trying to prove?  The acting was pathetic. The script made me lose IQ points.  The costuming.... hold on-.... sorry I had to go to the bathroom and throw up.  I really hate this movie.  It nearly ruined my entire childhood.

Speaking of nearly ruining my childhood... another movie I can barely stand to watch: G.I. Joe Rise of Cobra.  How the frell up something so bad that should be so easy is only something Hollywood can do.  Bionic power suits, crummy CGI.  Random uses of useless Joe's and what the entire $%#@ was going on with Cobra Commander?  I hate that movie (not nearly as much as troll 2 but hate it nonetheless). It nearly ruined my childhood.  But oddly enough like with the troll movies, as much hate this movie, I love the other one.  Go figure.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: HarryTrotter on October 24, 2017, 06:12:16 PM
Which kinda reminds me,Nostalgia Critic did a review of GI Joe the Movie recently.That one wasn't all that great either.
I can't remember anything I really,really hate,but Judge Dredd (95),for doing soon much damage to the public perception of JD and killing any chance for an adaptation for years to come.I do hate that movie.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: crimsonquill on October 24, 2017, 06:28:19 PM
Speaking of nearly ruining my childhood... another movie I can barely stand to watch: G.I. Joe Rise of Cobra.  How the frell up something so bad that should be so easy is only something Hollywood can do.  Bionic power suits, crummy CGI.  Random uses of useless Joe's and what the entire $%#@ was going on with Cobra Commander?  I hate that movie (not nearly as much as troll 2 but hate it nonetheless). It nearly ruined my childhood.  But oddly enough like with the troll movies, as much hate this movie, I love the other one.  Go figure.

How can Hollywood manage to pull off MEGAFORCE (which just seems to be born from the same inspirational cloth) using a budget that was far lower then what Mad Max: The Road Warrior had to work with PLUS understood it was an '80s action film so they embraced the cheesiness right out of the gate.. and then when Paramount gets the chance to make G.I. Joe a huge blockbuster action film they just go wayyyyy over the top with 3D gimmicks for bargain CGI while throwing out most of what made COBRA work so they were left with a weak origin story and missed the bullseye completely. *shakes my head*

Oh, just in case everyone is going.. What is MEGAFORCE? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q9yPSkQTLlA (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q9yPSkQTLlA)

- CQ
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: Shogunn2517 on October 25, 2017, 06:14:05 AM
Oh, just in case everyone is going.. What is MEGAFORCE? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q9yPSkQTLlA (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q9yPSkQTLlA)

- CQ

Quote
I don't know what the hell is going on in the most wonderful way!

-Shogunn2517 as he watches that Megaforce trailer.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: crimsonquill on October 25, 2017, 08:56:25 AM
-Shogunn2517 as he watches that Megaforce trailer.

Just wait until you watch the music video in all it's 80s hair metal glory.

https://youtu.be/z4RNPlgktpI (https://youtu.be/z4RNPlgktpI)

As far as the plotline, I'll fit it into a nutshell:
Spoiler: ShowHide
The U.S. Government has created an elite team of soldiers assembled from every military force to combat terrorism across the world. They hide this elite unit in a top secret bunker deep underground where they receive plane and truck loads of awesome hardware in all kinds of colors and sizes to test out and use on their missions. If there isn't a war machine fitting to a mission then they will take what they have and build something that fits the job. They have a Kung Fu expert, A cowboy with a Hologram projector built into his truck, a tech guy who guides the team in his ATV with a radar on top, and a leader that just oozes '80s charisma and even knows the film's villain because they went to war school together before he became power hungry. Doesn't everything I just mentioned sound like it's ripped from cartoon scripts of Transformers, G.I. Joe, and M.A,S,K.? Yup, It's everything that a live action G.I. JOE movie should have been and Hasbro was just focusing on their cartoon series at the time. I swear some writer and director were sitting on their couch watching their kids shows in 1981 and took notes and said "I'm going to make a hell of a movie with this!"


Now the worst part is this film was showed to death on cable/satellite movie stations for years and even had a short lived lifetime on DVD before the rights lapsed (Trying to find a copy on eBay or Amazon oversea imports is like finding a needle in a haystack and way more expensive then it should be). It's a cult classic action film and I swear that Paramount buried the rights for future releases once they got a hold of the G.I. JOE franchise (EDIT: Son of a#$#@! It was Paramount that released it on DVD in Japan before the rights went into limbo.. geez. I hate when I'm right!). It's never been remastered or even released on BluRay and every copy that I've seen around is bootlegs from the Japanese release or copies of the ultra rare U.S. DVDs.

Course the cult status of MEGAFORCE is up for debate for embracing it's 80s cheese since it was tackled by the Rifftrax (yes, the guys from MST3K after their show went on hiatus) team and we lucky fans found this sample on Youtube.  https://youtu.be/12PlGeUInrE (https://youtu.be/12PlGeUInrE). Enjoy!

- CQ
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: BentonGrey on October 25, 2017, 03:09:37 PM
My life is deeply, deeply impoverished by my not having known about this movie!  My goodness, I'm going to have to track this sucker down!  This is gloriously 80s!  :D :lol:

Also, yes, that is basically G.I. JOE with the names changed.  As incredibly cheesy and ridiculous as it was, I'd still take this over pretty much all of the 80s revival movies of today.  :P

And I'll add my frustration and confusion about how Hollywood could botch G.I. JOE.  With the incredible comics by Hama, the script practically writes itself.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: Deaths Jester on October 25, 2017, 11:55:21 PM
Hey...I think I've seen Megaforce before. Didn't know that was it's name at the time though, just knew what I was watching was a cult flick. (I'm a big cult and trash pic watcher and will try to at least watch most at least once. Course that also means I've seen some real pieces of crap too...)
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: Shogunn2517 on October 26, 2017, 07:28:56 AM
And I'll add my frustration and confusion about how Hollywood could botch G.I. JOE.  With the incredible comics by Hama, the script practically writes itself.

A-tothehellzeffinyeah-MEN!!!!!

Larry Hama canonized himself with that run!  That series was WAY before it's time!  The show, which is mana from my childhood is what it is, but when I got to those comics, it completely blew the cartoon out the water!
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: HarryTrotter on October 26, 2017, 02:03:28 PM
Okay,okay,In the blood.How bad a movie must be when you feel Danny Treyo is above the material?
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: BentonGrey on October 26, 2017, 02:20:07 PM

A-tothehellzeffinyeah-MEN!!!!!

Larry Hama canonized himself with that run!  That series was WAY before it's time!  The show, which is mana from my childhood is what it is, but when I got to those comics, it completely blew the cartoon out the water!

Entirely true, Shogunn, entirely true.  Those comics are amazing, and with the whole, Hama created something really special.  I LOVED the cartoon as a kid, and I still have a soft spot for it today, but the comics are an order of magnitude greater.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: daglob on February 16, 2018, 01:45:47 AM
Resurrecting this thread...

Tonight on Comet they have a double blasphemy: a Larry Buchanan double feature: "It's Alive" and :"Creature of Destruction", both with the same cheapo monster.

Oh, no... "Creature" has a song about... Batman?
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: kkhohoho on February 16, 2018, 04:49:24 AM
Speaking of 'worst movies', I'm probably going to watch The Room this weekend. For the first time.

Pray for me.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: daglob on February 16, 2018, 06:28:04 AM
What did you do? That sounds like cruel and unusual punishment; I'd file an appeal.

And I realized during one of the commercials for other movies, that, while the whole monster was re-used in "It Lives" (or the other way around), the eyes and eyebrows were re used in "Curse of the Swamp Creature". Ol' Larry either liked ping pong eyeballs or his budget was that bad. I know the movie was.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: GhostMachine on February 16, 2018, 08:04:19 AM
You know, I've been hoping for a while that my cable company would pick up Comet, but after seeing a lot of the movies listed that they've aired mention here....I'm not so sure, anymore.  :P

(Also wish they'd pick up Chiller. I watched it some when we visited Heidi's parents in New Hampshire last year.)
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: kkhohoho on February 20, 2018, 02:47:07 AM
Watched The Room. No doubts about it. One of the worst movies I've ever seen.

...

It was beautiful. :thumbup:
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: daglob on February 20, 2018, 05:49:34 AM
But what was it, the dismal acting (or lack thereof), shoddy production values, off-key non-melodic soundtrack, an abundance of "Ugly" (see the movie "Kansas City Confidential"; Neville Brand, Jack Elam, and Lee Van Cleef, all in one movie), a script written by a kindergartner, what?
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: kkhohoho on February 20, 2018, 02:26:44 PM
But what was it, the dismal acting (or lack thereof), shoddy production values, off-key non-melodic soundtrack, an abundance of "Ugly" (see the movie "Kansas City Confidential"; Neville Brand, Jack Elam, and Lee Van Cleef, all in one movie), a script written by a kindergartner, what?

Everything. It isn't just that it's bad. It's awkwardly bad. It's like looking into some delusional state of reality, and the result is both mystifying and hilarious.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Comet TV Marathon: Best of the Worst
Post by: daglob on February 26, 2018, 05:09:10 AM
Deciding they couldn't compete with the Academy Award, Comet-TV decided to put on a display of movies that never had a chance to be nominated... because they were bad. See if you recognize any of the titles off this list:

Troll 2
Eegah!
Mac and Me
Santa Claus Conquers the Martians
Garbage Pail Kid Movie.

Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Comet TV Marathon: Best of the Worst
Post by: Silver Shocker on February 26, 2018, 11:07:30 PM
I remember Santa Claus Conquers the Martians, I've actually seen the Garbage Pail Kids Movie (I didn't really like it) and Troll 2 is pretty infamous for being So Bad It's Good: "They're eating her. And then they're going to eat me. OH MY GOOOOOOOOOD!!!"
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Comet TV Marathon: Best of the Worst
Post by: daglob on February 14, 2019, 05:46:11 PM
Reviving this for one reason, really. Comet has become an outlet for a lot of TV shows, and has lost a lot of its' charm, but today they are running a Valentine's Day marathon, and Mars Needs Women is among them. I decided to look up Tommy Kirk and he had a quote that I find amusing:

"Larry Buchannan is like a cinematic serial killer, and he should be stopped before he kills again."

Pretty much sums it up.

Kirk does say that Buchannan was a nice guy and great to work with.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: HarryTrotter on February 14, 2019, 06:15:54 PM
Tommy clearly never meet Uwe Boll.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: GhostMachine on February 18, 2019, 04:15:01 PM
Is The Room `Plan 9 From Outer Space' bad, or `Why would anyone willingly watch this crap?!' bad?

Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: HarryTrotter on February 18, 2019, 04:22:49 PM
A bit of both really.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: HarryTrotter on March 24, 2019, 09:04:14 PM
The Predator.And not an amusing chessy 80's homage way I expected.Its just bad.
Not only does it f*ck up Predator lore,it also thinks that autism is the next step in the human evolution.And likes to reminds us that Predators have EXOskeletons UNDER the skin.And they still have the HUD and heat vision without the mask.I could go on,but I think...Predator dogs,motherfunting Predator dogs.
And worst of all,it ends with the same sequel hook as Pacific Rim Uprising and Independence Day Resurgance.And the Predator dogs,mother...sorry,I just cant get over that one.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: daglob on March 24, 2019, 10:17:34 PM
So... I take it you didn't like it?

I have my doubts about The Twilight Zone reboot. Too often the people doing the reboots decide they can fix what was not broken in the first place (I know, I harp on this a lot, but it happens A LOT!!).

I think in the original Predator they did see in infra-red; the one in Predator II used the helmet to shift to a different frequency (U/V?) so he could see in the freezer. No HUD when the original one lost his helmet, though.

Predator dogs...
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: GhostMachine on March 24, 2019, 10:26:10 PM
The problem with the Twilight Zone reboot is that a very big chunk of the original writers are deceased, not just Rod Serling. The reboot of The Outer Limits reboot that ran mid-90's to early 2000s worked because a lot of the writers from the original series were still alive and worked on it. So even though I won't be watching (I'm not paying for CBS All-Access any time soon, if at all/ever), my best guess is that it will feature a lot of remakes of old scripts from the original or stories by new authors that pale in comparison quality-wise and may not even fit the concept properly. Namely stories that Serling would toss in the trash if he was still alive.

I've no desirw to watch STAR TREK: DISCOVERY or the new version of THE TWILIGHT ZONE. My interest may be piqued when Picard's new series airs, but I doubt it. THE ORVILLE fills my STAR TREK needs enough, even though it isn't really STAR TREK. And I'm not a fan of the Kelvin timeline.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: Silver Shocker on March 25, 2019, 04:06:29 AM
The Predator.And not an amusing chessy 80's homage way I expected.Its just bad.
Not only does it f*ck up Predator lore,it also thinks that autism is the next step in the human evolution.And likes to reminds us that Predators have EXOskeletons UNDER the skin.And they still have the HUD and heat vision without the mask.I could go on,but I think...Predator dogs,motherfunting Predator dogs.
And worst of all,it ends with the same sequel hook as Pacific Rim Uprising and Independence Day Resurgance.And the Predator dogs,mother...sorry,I just cant get over that one.

I've heard in reviews that the new Predator was heavily reedited and reshot and such before release. Though, like Suicide Squad and Justice League, there was no guarantee the original one was going to be any good anyway.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: HarryTrotter on March 25, 2019, 08:16:02 PM
http://whatculture.com/film/the-predator-18-wtf-moments?page=6 (http://whatculture.com/film/the-predator-18-wtf-moments?page=6)
And the definite crowning scene.Description doesnt do it justice,this needs to be seen.I s*it you not.  :lol:
Seems like another case where doing nothing would yield better result.Have a group of bada$$es.Predator hunts them.All you have to do.
And Predator dogs.With dredlocks.Im sorry but I cant process that.  :huh:

Im glad people here like Orville,btw.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: SickAlice on June 12, 2019, 11:26:25 PM
The Addiction is making my top ten for sure. The movie was enticing, it has vampires, deals with addiction and a decent line-up connected to the early Tarantino stuff. At least that's what the ad says. It has the word vampire more like it and is a straight up PSA just like you watched in high school and just as terrible but with a wasted budget. That's all it is. There is one enjoyable scene only and it's Christopher Walken taking about pooping. But again you can just as well watch that online and spare yourself the trouble. In fact I'll save you the time.

https://ytcropper.com/cropped/K65d0189cd14194 (https://ytcropper.com/cropped/K65d0189cd14194)

And yeah, that last Predator was a big dud. Trying to pretend it never happened.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: daglob on July 28, 2019, 03:31:50 AM
Nightmare Theater tonight has a movie entitled "Warning From Space". It is a pretty dismal movie, the only interesting thing about it is that a bunch of Starros are running around...
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: BentonGrey on July 28, 2019, 11:10:22 PM
Shame there's not a JLA to fight them, ha.

I just rewatched the MST3K version of the The Crawling Terror, and MAN was that bad.  It's up there in the worst of the MST3K movies.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: daglob on July 28, 2019, 11:54:50 PM
I first heard of that movie in one of the "Golden Turkey Award" books. The story behind it is interesting, as I remember, and the makers of the movie were quite ingenious. It didn't help, but otherwise it would have been a lot worse.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: BentonGrey on July 29, 2019, 01:18:35 AM
Haha, yeah, it definitely didn't.  :)
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: SickAlice on September 06, 2019, 09:26:52 PM
Still leaning towards Leonard Part 6 for the bottom rung. It's like the film Terrorvision. My old roommate funded that movie and the only reason it happened was because the people that made it wanted to make a movie in their life, they didn't care what it was about or if it was good. Leonard Part 6 was that. Cosby wanted to make a movie and I can imagine after being told his ideas were stupid got heated and they just let him put whatever he pleased in that script, it was his money anyways. Difference of course here is his had a budget and a big studio backing it yet turned out worse and less redeemable than Terrorvision did.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: SuperPoweredYank on September 09, 2019, 04:04:28 AM
Pillow of Death is probably the worst I've seen that wasn't on MST3K. It spends the whole movie following a man (played by Lon Chaney Jr.) who's been accused of murder. He then sets out to prove his innocence, all the while the voice of his supposed victim taunts him, claiming he did kill her. But then... (Incoming spoilers for a 70+ year old film)
Spoiler: ShowHide
...it just turns out he did commit the murder and was just so crazy he didn't remember. He then goes back to being crazy and jumps out the window to his death. I'm convinced they only included this twist for the sake of having a twist ending.

The whole movie just ends up being a meaningless waste of time because of this.

I should note I haven't seen a whole lot of truly terrible films.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: daglob on September 09, 2019, 04:27:41 AM
Pillow of Death is probably the worst I've seen that wasn't on MST3K. It spends the whole movie following a man (played by Lon Chaney Jr.) who's been accused of murder. He then sets out to prove his innocence, all the while the voice of his supposed victim taunts him, claiming he did kill her. But then... (Incoming spoilers for a 70+ year old film)
Spoiler: ShowHide
...it just turns out he did commit the murder and was just so crazy he didn't remember. He then goes back to being crazy and jumps out the window to his death. I'm convinced they only included this twist for the sake of having a twist ending.

The whole movie just ends up being a meaningless waste of time because of this.

I should note I haven't seen a whole lot of truly terrible films.

That was an Inner Sanctum movie. They were all uneven and often a little weird. I believe they also had the taking head in the crystal ball.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: daglob on September 09, 2019, 05:52:50 PM
The head in the ball was also used in the tele version of Night Gallery...

As for junk movies...I've got a whole list of them...

I looked it up; this was the last Inner Sanctum movie, and they did not use the "head in the ball" for it. All the others did, though. A couple of those movies have shown up on Svengoolie and he makes fun of it.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: SuperPoweredYank on September 09, 2019, 10:28:33 PM

A couple of those movies have shown up on Svengoolie and he makes fun of it.
Yeah that's where I saw it. I only watched it because I was curious about the Inner Sanctum movies. Even Sven complained about the ending when it was over.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw...
Post by: daglob on October 01, 2019, 03:03:08 PM
Resurrecting this thread...

Tonight on Comet they have a double blasphemy: a Larry Buchanan double feature: "It's Alive" and :"Creature of Destruction", both with the same cheapo monster.

Oh, no... "Creature" has a song about... Batman?

https://monstermoviemusic.blogspot.com/2008/03/creature-of-destruction-max-lipscomb.html

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YlRYLG40N2M
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: UnkoMan on October 08, 2019, 06:06:03 AM
The Addiction is making my top ten for sure. The movie was enticing, it has vampires, deals with addiction and a decent line-up connected to the early Tarantino stuff. At least that's what the ad says. It has the word vampire more like it and is a straight up PSA just like you watched in high school and just as terrible but with a wasted budget. That's all it is. There is one enjoyable scene only and it's Christopher Walken taking about pooping. But again you can just as well watch that online and spare yourself the trouble. In fact I'll save you the time.

I was going to rant about how actual bad movies are the ones so boring that no amount of wobbly pops and jokes can make them better, and you literally have to stop in the middle because it's just so nothing...

But instead I just want to say, The Addiction is dope as hell. I love that film.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: Silver Shocker on January 08, 2021, 07:56:05 AM
More necroposting I suppose. I watched a movie the other night that I hated so intensely that I feel the need to vent it out into the world for someone to hear and hopefully, get some enjoyment out of reading.

I just watched Tenet, the latest Christopher Nolan film and the big movie release of the second half of 2020. The movie that had a massive marketing campaign (in addition to tv ads, I saw many ads for it in a few mobile games I play on my tablet; this is also the case for Wonder Woman 1984) and which made headlines because Nolan insisted HAD to be seen in theaters.

From what I read online, it received a positive reaction from film critics and general audiences alike, and for those who enjoyed it, I'm happy for all of you out there.

My personally, I hated it. White-hot-rage-hated it.

I was profoundly disappointed by Mister Chris Nolan, as I expect, far, FAR better from him. I consider it the worst film I've ever seen, with the exception of one or two other films I won't mention because their subject matter can be a sensitive subject. It was, no doubt, the most disappointing film I've ever seen.  More so than Men in Black 2 ("a joyless cash-in"), MIB International, Suicide Squad, Birds of Prey, Justice League Dark: Apokalypse War, Anchorman 2 (not that there ever WAS an Anchorman 2, of course). My reasoning for this that I consider all of those to be actual films. I do not acknowledge Tenet as a Nolan film OR a actual film for numerous notable reasons, all of which I'll mention below. I watched the film with my father, and made a point to ask him what he thought of the film and he said "It wasn't very good. It was hard to follow." A good appraisal.

The film's gimmick is an effect where things are depicted as happening in reverse, which is shown heavily in the marketing, but appears very sparingly in the film itself until the final act, I found it unimpressive throughout. It's not a terribly interesting gimmick to start with, and IMO I didn't find the effect so impressive. Apparently the people involved with making the film were proud of the effects, and worked very hard on stunts to simulate the effect. This baffles and angers me, as the effect is so straight-forward and unimpressive they might as well have done the stunts the conventional way and just played the footage in reverse, which is what I originally assumed they did.

The pacing on this film is atrocious, with a relentlessly slow paced opening act and almost the entire film consisting of exposition and setup. You could be snarky and say that's Nolan for you, but I say this is crap by ANY metric. When I had this thing on I was thinking "This is really dull." After about 20 minutes or so I was saying I was waiting for the "actual movie" to start, and by the time the credits rolled, I felt like I had waited the entire movie's length for it to get going without it ever happening.

Characters spend almost the entire film going from location to location (some of which I got the feeling may have been added in with greenscreen/digital effects) to meet with and talk to characters in an terribly inefficient attempt to explain the plot. This results in a cameo early in the flick that I'm convinced has to be the laziest cameo I have ever seen in any film.

Spoiler: ShowHide
The great Micheal Kaine, who of course played Alfred in Nolan's Dark Knight trilogy and has fulfilled the Nolan tradition of having actors appear in multiple films made by him, phones it in by showing up on screen sitting at a table in a restaurant, delivering exposition to our protagonist (who, by the way, is never named). He never gets up, doesn't move from his seat at all, and does nothing but delivering his lines in a dry, bored tone, and then after about two minutes the scene ends. You could have had any actor, or even Nolan himself, do that part and it would have made no difference. The protagonist might as well have just read the information in text form.


The fight scenes in this are a joke. We have fights scenes that aren't even on par for a CW Arrowverse show like Arrow, a Marvel Netflix show like Daredevil or even Iron Fist. Our main character has a melee fight with a single nameless enemy decked out in full riot gear, presumably played by a stuntman each time, a few times throughout the flick for about a minute or so each. We also have the car chase scene from the trailer, which isn't even as intense or exciting as the kind of car chase scenes we've seen in films a million times over. The closest thing this snosefest gets to a wow moment is a car flipping over, something that was done better in, among other films, Die Hard 5 of all things.

This film has exactly one saving grace, other than the moment the credits-on-black finally pop up. And that is, of course, the great Kenneth Brannagh, who plays a Russian mobster (because of course he is) and is here to do one thing and precisely one thing only: ham it up like it is his sole purpose in life, and bless him, he does it with gusto. He chews every inch of the scenery for almost every frame he's onscreen, and it's the only time this thing has any kind of energy. Any time he's not on screen I found myself awaiting the next time he shows up. If I  heard him say he hammed it up because he could tell this thing was going to be dull, I would absolutely believe it. During the otherwise worthless car chase scene, a car pulls up in the background with him visible through the window, and he manages to mug for the camera without even saying anything. It's all quite the showing and a highlight reel of his material on Youtube would far preferable to watching the full movie. Sadly, the moment when he is written out of the film, near the end of the film, is so abrupt and underwhelming it feels like a giant middle finger on the screen pointed at me for enjoying his role exclusively.

I've heard this film compared to another Nolan film, Inception, and I reject the notion. As far as I'm concerned, comparing this piece of junk to Inception is a grave insult to Inception, which is not only a very good film, but is far more entertaining than this film and better than it in every possible way. I'd compare this to a fan film, but that's also an insult to fan films too, as those are pretty consistently interesting and have a sense of fun and energy to them. I've heard repeatedly that you need to watch this film more than once to understand it, and I can't imagine myself ever doing so because I didn't like it to begin with, and I don't think it's likely I'd enjoy it on a repeat viewing.

I'll always give Nolan credit for making movies he's passionate about, he's no hack, but I sure hope the next film that comes out from him that I end up watching is more fun than this was.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: HarryTrotter on January 08, 2021, 08:21:54 AM
From the recent-ish movies that I found massively overhyped- Knives Out. It was hyped as this old-school Poirot-like murder mystery,but its not even a parody. Breakdowns of the movie on yt are longer then the actual movie,so I don't feel like typing out all the things that make no sense or where everyone acts like a complete idiot so the plot could happen. Main gimmick of the movie is that the MC barfs whenever she lies. And now you probably guessed two "twists" of the movie. Also Daniel Craig does a Kentucky accent whole time,and its just hilarious.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: Silver Shocker on January 08, 2021, 01:45:14 PM
I haven't bothered to watch that, so I don't know if I'd like it, but I have seen people online who didn't care for one of the director's other movies say they were pleasantly surprised by it. I'm a bit curious where I'd fall in myself.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: Tomato on January 08, 2021, 02:00:22 PM
So I don't tend to watch a lot of bad movies, but next week-ish my IRL friends are going to be compiling a list of "bad" movies that we're going to whittle down to a more manageable watch session. They tend to be "so bad it's funny" kinda films, but I know these are on the table:

Avatar TLA
The Room
Attack of the Killer Tomatoes (not my pick)
Dragonball Evolution
Star Wars Christmas Special (the real one, not the lego one)
Super Mario Brothers
Street Fighter (probably one of the better ones on the list, mostly in there for the camp factor)

Green Lantern is also in there, but that's my "safety" pick since I actually don't hate that movie. We're going to be voting on these, so films that are just bad and aren't really enjoyable probably won't make the list. Catwoman, for example, was mentioned but we all were just like... no.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: HarryTrotter on January 08, 2021, 04:39:08 PM
Attack of Killer Tomatoes is intentionally bad,so that kinda disqualifies it.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: Silver Shocker on January 08, 2021, 06:18:51 PM
Quote
Attack of Killer Tomatoes is intentionally bad,so that kinda disqualifies it.

Trying to trying to decide if I agree on that....
Funny enough, the only movie I've ever watched with friends to riff on was Jurassic World, and that movie was at least partially satire about itself, so technically that's disqualified.

Interesting stuff. I was recently thinking about how dedicated I am to watching just about every film and television adaptation DC and Marvel put out, but I never bothered with Catwoman and I'm not exactly planning to.
I didn't hate GL either. I've always agreed with you that if a DC cinematic universe spun out of that movie it could been a lot more fun. I'm looking forward to DC giving the IP another shot in the future (the return of John Stewart Diggle can't come soon enough!)

Will you and your group be like the Red Letter Media guys and give your thoughts on which one was "Best of the Worst"?
So which ones of those have you actually seen already, if any?
Getting back to Jurassic World. My brother was the one was pushing for it but the other two in the group weren't particularly into it and in more recent years one of them outright refused to watch its sequel JW: Fallen Kingdom because he didn't like the first one. Which is a shame because Fallen Kingdom is a far, far dumber movie and could be a lot of fun to riff on in the right group.

Funny thing is, I think Tenet WOULD be a good movie to riff on with my old viewing group, unfortunately I'll probably never have that opportunity because me and the other members of that group have gone our separate ways in the last two years.

Quote
Star Wars Christmas Special (the real one, not the lego one)

Ah, that one WAS featured on Best of the Worst, and that made me crystal clear I don't ever want to take the plunge because it's apparently really bad, but apparently dreadfully dull as well. I've heard online that the Lego one is really bad but I have to admit I'm mildly curious what I'd think of it. I probably wouldn't dislike it as much as some others did.

Quote
Dragonball Evolution
Oh boy, you enjoy that.  I've never seen that, but I did see a pretty epic Nostalia Critic-esque riff on it (I seem to recall it was specifically inspired by NC) years ago from a Youtuber I watch, that was on Blip and, I think, is gone forever now (and likely couldn't have put on Youtube anyway because it used a LOT of footage). The guy was a huge fan of Dragon Ball (he once said it was his favorite anime) and he wasn't kind to it (few were). Probably my favorite two parts of it that I can recall were him playing the Bulk and Skull music from Power Rangers over the parts with the high school bullies, and his utter disbelief that a minor supporting character (who I always assumed was based on Mr. Popo) was played by Ernie Hudson ("WINSTON?")

 Dragon Ball creator Akira Toriyama himself bashed the film,  and the always delightful Sonny Straight (the voice of Krillin in the Funimation dub) bashed it with aplomb at a convention when asked about it. (Starts at 1:28).  (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1zUQOPldqww)

Pretty great that someone in the audience called it the "worst movie I've ever seen in my life." And as an added bonus, Sonny's comments about the power of Hollywood CGI circa 2010 and his comments on Iron Man 1 and 2 are even more amusing with the benefit of hindsight than they were 10 or so years ago.

Sonny saying "Funimation had nothing to do with it" is a bit funnier considering Christopher Sabat voiced the titular dragon, Shenron, in the film itself, while Yamcha's voice and performance were quite obviously based on Sabot's surfer-dude esque take on the character.

Misguided as the thing was, the fact that a few of the major actors went on to be in much better stuff is nice. If that movie played any role in Jamie Chung playing Go-Go, Blink or Death or the Endless, than I can thank DBE for that. I can definitely thank DBE for James Marsters' being cast as Zamazu in Dragon Ball Super, because he made what was already what I consider the first legitimately good Super-exclusive arc even more awesome.

Super Mario Bros...an "anti-classic" for sure. I saw that as a kid, during that time in my childhood before Nintendo became absolutely terrified of letting anyone make Western made cartoons or movies based on their work. I've heard he hated working on it, but I always thought Bob Hoskins was perfectly cast as Mario. And I think John Leguizamo is fine if you pretend you've never hear of Luigi (I still call him Luigi to this day).

Ah, Street Fighter  :wub:.....I saw it on tv around the time I got out of high school or so and I thought it was stupid, but because of the internet, I've come to accept it because of Raul Julia of course. Even then I thought the casting of Kylie Minogue was terrible (which resulted in Cammy having an Austrailan accent in the 90's Street Fighter cartoon despite being British), there's a whole lot of meta humor springing from the fact that Ming-Na Wen was Chun-Li. For example, in Marvel Versus Capcom 3 Chun-Li was depicted as having a crush on Thor. And of course, the single most beloved scene in the movie is the scene with her character talking to Bison.  Realizing that Dee Jay was played by the same actor as a character on a tv then-current tv show I was watching right around the time I saw the film) was amusing. While Zangief wasn't exactly faithful, he did give us one of the most fondly remembered jokes in the movie. The film also had a pretty solid influence on the 90's U.S. cartoon, which I watched a few years ago and really enjoyed, cheesy as it was. Seeing that show develop the movie version of Dhalsim into the video game version of the character was rather impressive.

I imagine most people can agree it's better for not being The Legend of Chun-Li (I wonder if that would be good for a bad movie night?)
The release of Street Fighter IV and V as well as other, more recent, much better adaptations (the Udon comics are SOOO good!)  has made me a huge Street Fighter fan in recent years, so I'll always appreciate that seemingly every incarnation of Bison is an absolute beast.

For me, the biggest disappointment in that movie, from a hindsight point of view, is that being based on SFII means that a lot of my favorite characters in the franchise aren't in it.

I'd love to see what Hollywood could do with other video properties after having learned to make effort. Because if Hollywood could nail some of the more creative and nutty characters from that franchise that I've grown to love, that'd be something to see. While games based around fighting tournaments (see also: Mortal Kombat) are notoriously tricky to properly adapt into stand alone films, I'd really like to see more tv and movie adaptations of the series lore.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: HarryTrotter on January 08, 2021, 06:33:18 PM
One of the consequences of Dragon Ball Evolution was James Marsters picking up the anime and getting really into it. So he probably jumped at th chance to be in Super.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: Silver Shocker on January 08, 2021, 06:47:21 PM
One of the consequences of Dragon Ball Evolution was James Marsters picking up the anime and getting really into it. So he probably jumped at th chance to be in Super.

Sounds about right. I don't know if more intel became available in the few years since, but his casting as Zamazu had to be a thinly-veiled secret. He was credited under a pseudonym, which admittedly happens a LOT with anime due to a lot of the dubbing industry being non-union, and the fact that just about everyone not named Britney Karbowski wants to be at least a little discrete about dubbing some of the more risque titles. But it's also possible it was to preserve the surprise to make it a little more special. I mean, it's OBVIOUSLY him (he sounds almost identical to Marsters' Luthor). My brother opined on who was the best performance/voice role in Dragon Ball Super much earlier in the run, but I'd say  Marsters as Zamazu would be up there for sure.

That wasn't even the first amazing instance of stunt casting in the Super Dub either. That would be the casting of Copy Vegeta, who was voiced by the original voice actor for Vegeta, Brian Drummond. So we had Drummond's Vegeta versus Sabat's Vegeta, which was so cool.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: daglob on January 08, 2021, 09:47:55 PM
Let's face it; you could can taking about bad, BAD, and BAD movies forever.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: Tomato on January 09, 2021, 03:18:43 AM
I think your timeline might be off. Marsters was a fan of the series at least by post-production, because he was the one actively fighting to get Piccolo changed to green (he was flesh tone during filming, he was made green in post), and I remember him giving interviews in the lead-up to release and after where he was very enthusiastic about the material and was genuinely happy about getting to play Piccolo. I don't know if getting the role inspired him to read the manga, but by the end he was the one person involved I felt the worst for. So happy to see him get to play a proper role in Super. IIRC I actually pirated that one, since there was a big call to not give that movie any money.

That said, there was a time where I actually really liked Super Mario Brothers (even had some garbage fanart of my takes on Wario/Waluigi in the movie's style with actors from that era... It's been a long time, but I THINK my fan casting for Waluigi was Tim Curry)... but I was like, 12 or something. I've since rewatched it and... woof.

I've never seen Killer Tomatoes, but one of my friends will bring up watching it as a joke on occasion (they know my tag) and realized he could do it for real, which is why I think it made his list.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: Silver Shocker on January 09, 2021, 05:02:59 AM
I think your timeline might be off. Marsters was a fan of the series at least by post-production, because he was the one actively fighting to get Piccolo changed to green (he was flesh tone during filming, he was made green in post), and I remember him giving interviews in the lead-up to release and after where he was very enthusiastic about the material and was genuinely happy about getting to play Piccolo. I don't know if getting the role inspired him to read the manga, but by the end he was the one person involved I felt the worst for. So happy to see him get to play a proper role in Super. IIRC I actually pirated that one, since there was a big call to not give that movie any money.

 To quote Cell (my favorite DBZ villain, for the record) "An interesting story."  (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ruPSr8uSoZQ)

I can't say I object to not spending money on DBE. I sure wouldn't. Mind you, you'd have to directly pay me well to review it before I'd ever turn it on.

I do recall a minor controversy over King Piccolo's visual design.

That said, there was a time where I actually really liked Super Mario Brothers (even had some garbage fanart of my takes on Wario/Waluigi in the movie's style with actors from that era... It's been a long time, but I THINK my fan casting for Waluigi was Tim Curry)... but I was like, 12 or something. I've since rewatched it and... woof.

I never had anything about it I disliked as a kid, but as a kid I was pretty easy to please I suppose. Then again, I kinda knew to some degree Ninja Turtles 3 was the worst one, even if I didn't specifically know what or even think of it (one would think it would be the lack of franchise villains in it)
As a kid my entire family knew full Batman & Robin was going to be bad though, and the first time I watched it I understood why. Though I really enjoyed Batman Forever as a kid. And these days you can always say it's not Batman & Robin. (and hey, there you go, more legendarily bad movies). In the words of Linkara "with some saying DC movies have become too dark, is Batman & Robin really THAT bad? OH LORD YES. Just goes to show, there's more than one way something can suck." So true. Robot Chicken's one line dig at Batman Forever could have just as easily been aimed at Batman & Robin.

On the topic of live action Waluigi (see when I saw it he didn't exist), Funny you say that, because I couldn't help but notice that Jim Carrey's Dr. Robotnik/Eggman sure looks a lot like Wario.

I guess we're in thread derailing mode at this point, but I've never really gotten the whole Waluigi thing, but for some reason or another people really want him in Smash, and I am surprised and disappointed Nintendo hasn't done it. Of all the characters, 3 goshdarn season passes for Ultimate, and a gosh darn Piranha Plant, Bayonetta and who knows how many Fire Emblem characters, you still can't play as Geno, Fawful, Meowth, Groose (from Zelda: Skyward Sword, who was basically Flash Thompson with the character development), Girahim, Fii, Demise, Midna, anyone created for Hyrule Warriors, Shantae, Shovel Knight, Chun-Li or Eggman. The Sonic voice actors even recorded a skit for the official twitter mocking the lack of playable Eggman in Smash.

Mind you, I don't have any interest in casting a new live action Mario and Luigi. I wouldn't even know where to start. Plus we're supposed to be getting an animated film. Unfortunately it's being done by the minions people.
I think Lord and Miller (The Lego Movie, 21 Jump Street) would be ideally suite to an animated Mario movie.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: Tomato on January 09, 2021, 04:45:04 PM
I've developed a certain... softness on Batman and Robin. It's not good, at all, but I watched a review talking about the Joel movies, and while I won't go out of my way to watch it, I don't actively hate it either. Basically the gist is that after Forever sold all the toys, WB told Joel to go all in on the camp... and he did. Compared to Forever, B&R is a film that's at least consistent in tone and direction. It's not a GOOD tone or direction, but it's at least not jumping between bad adult film, campy villainy, and serious introspection on a Batman who's ready to retire.

I have a bit to say on Smash, but I'll move that to another thread so this doesn't get derailed even more.

P.S. Regarding the SMB movie... I'll grant you minions is a fad that needs to die, be buried, and have an atomic bomb go off on top of, but Nintendo's been very on top of this one (they do NOT want another fiasco like the live action movie) and that studio has done good work on other films (the Grinch movie was a decent adaptation and even Despicable Me was pretty good).
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: Silver Shocker on January 10, 2021, 04:44:14 PM
I've developed a certain... softness on Batman and Robin. It's not good, at all, but I watched a review talking about the Joel movies, and while I won't go out of my way to watch it, I don't actively hate it either. Basically the gist is that after Forever sold all the toys, WB told Joel to go all in on the camp... and he did. Compared to Forever, B&R is a film that's at least consistent in tone and direction. It's not a GOOD tone or direction, but it's at least not jumping between bad adult film, campy villainy, and serious introspection on a Batman who's ready to retire.

Fair enough. However, Linkara also pointed out that the defense of B&R is that it's the Adam West Batman, but Linkara pointed out "The Adam West show is actually funny."
And, having finally seen the entire series on Canadian reruns in recent years, I can attest, that is in fact the case. And now I know that a lot of the bat-guano insane nonsensical creativity in Return of the Caped Crusaders (WHY DO YOU HAVE THESE THINGS?) was taken straight from the show (and the movie iteration of it, which I got to see on Netflix). The reason why it's funny is that, as Peter David pointed out, it's a straight up comedy that, due to Adam West's portrayal in particular, is doing a such a good job of elements of it being played straight and underplaying it (not counting the hammy villains of course  - the reason I and other fans online called Gotham "Got Ham") that kids like myself were completely fooled and thought it was a straight forward superhero show (Batman: Brave and the Bold, of course, kinda half does it, either going a bit too silly or plugging in elements from the newer comics - they did that back then too) So yeah, anyway, Batman and Robin wants you to know SO bad that it's a comedy that it's not really funny, it's kinda just annoying and stupid ("It's the hockey team from hell!" "Never leave the cave without it!") Compare to Lego Batman - Lego Batman IS a parody of the official product while also BEING the official product and a functioning and satisfyingly story, but it's actually funny! ("You made all those [villains] up!" "Nope, they're all real! Might be worth a Google!" and yes, I knew all but one of them) Plus they plugged in the Mister Freeze origin story in B&R but that was the only thing they did....it's a mess. It's not an offensive mess that makes you think less of DC and their movies and stop looking forward to them as much like nowadays, but it's still a mess. I've been thinking about DC and their (live action movies) a lot lately, and one of things I land on (in terms of villains) is Poison Ivy is...actually pretty good, all things considered. She's just in a really bad movie. Dialed down just enough, it's Poison Ivy for sure.

Oh NO! So anyway...

Quote
P.S. Regarding the SMB movie... I'll grant you minions is a fad that needs to die, be buried, and have an atomic bomb go off on top of, but Nintendo's been very on top of this one (they do NOT want another fiasco like the live action movie) and that studio has done good work on other films (the Grinch movie was a decent adaptation and even Despicable Me was pretty good).

I'm sure you're right, Schumaker's other movies (such as Phone Booth) are nothing like B&R and Martin Campell directed Goldeneye, Casino Royal AND Green Lantern. (and David Fincher "directed" Alien 3, but let's not go there) Grinch isn't too hard to figure out - that version, from what I heard, had the exact same problem it was ALWAYS going to have - it's too damn padded. Sometimes less is more guys. If you're just to make up stuff to add to the original stuff, it needs to feel organic and like it serves the story (those of us who watch long running anime know the difference between "bad filler" and "actually pretty good filler" and "actually pretty good filler that goes on a little too long".

Nintendo....it should be pretty easy to figure out, but I guess the studio system such makes it a bit harder. When it's a cartoon, well, they do that already, just as much as they could in Nintendo's Case (The Star Fox and Kid Icarus animated shorts are not really good, but are, like the Resident Evil CGI movies, functionally new material from the games without the gameplay) If it resembles Mario properly and is a fun movie that kids AND adults can enjoy (Pixar often being the go-to example, but also Lord and Miller's body of work of course and I have been told How to Train Your Dragon is quite good - you see where my blatantly biased priorities lie in terms of what I actually watch) then there you go.

If people could make Sonic Boom into a pretty decent CGI cartoon by just making it into an animated sitcom in the two shorts format and then plug in internet memes and meta humor for S2, an animated Mario movie really shouldn't be hard. There's no particular reason you can't make something at least as functional as the Mario cartoons I watched a kid. When you start out by making it fully animated (and not a live action movie where human characters and some environments are live action and very little else) you've gotten ride of the biggest barrier right of the gate.

For me, personally, my main concern might be them flooding the cast with celebrities with stunt cast actors doing the voices, but that can certainly work (Will Arnett), and filling the soundtrack with licensed songs (but then again the "Super Show" did that too...) But it might not be an issue. The Peanuts movie was just delightful, and people grumbled about the pop songs in that, so there you go.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: HarryTrotter on February 13, 2021, 02:54:00 PM
Okay,the most unintentionally hilarious movie ever(or at least in the running)- Cyborg 2: Glass Shadow. A Blade Runner ripoff directed by the the dude who did Highlander 2 and Honey,I blew up the kids. So,then 17 y.o. Angelina Jolie(keep that in mind) is a cyborg with a bomb inside. She and her instructor (Elias Koteas) have to escape the corporation because love. While being pursued by cowboy Billy Drago and guided by the disembodied voice of Jack Palance. Btw,Billy Drago is the only one actually trying here,God bless him. At one point the scene keeps switching the main duo having sex and Jack Palance crying over a picture of his dead wife. 😂😂😂 It's the most wtf thing you will see in a while. Really,words don't do justice to this movie.
https://youtu.be/Tq2ZKlnYQzQ (https://youtu.be/Tq2ZKlnYQzQ)

If you were wondering,the first one was a MadMaxian dystopia about JCVD fighting some satanists,and has no connection to this one,whatsover.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: Silver Shocker on February 14, 2021, 03:47:21 AM
I'd heard of Cyborg 2, but didn't really know much about it. It sounds like something similar to the Highlanders sequels, so no big surprise there. The original live action Casey Jones being in it is kinda cool.
Title: Re: The worst movie you ever saw... Necroposting
Post by: HarryTrotter on February 14, 2021, 04:23:26 AM
Again,same director as Highlander 2. But this is at least entertaining.

Tbf,Elias had better roles. He was in basically everything.